Q.what is the diffrence between a jew and a pizza A.pizzas dont scream in the oven

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Roses are red violets are blue hes for me not for you if by chance you take my place ill take my fist and smash your face

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What did the boy say to the ghost wearing a banana outfit? Holy crap! A ghost!

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squash squash who squash my ass

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so if you need 20 dollars and you just kicked your cat how old is your mom. cake because you are a 666 member.

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What are the two things that the little boy with cancer wants for Christmas? He wants his cancer to go away. He also wants the new Halo game.

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Your mama is so ugly. But she is still a respected member of the community

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why did ya dad eat ya food?? because ya sister

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What did the homosexual get for Christmas off his boyfriend? A lovely present off his loving partner.

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whats helen kellers favorite activity fingering herself

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Why shouldnt you take the virginity of a 14 year old? Their pre-frontal lobe is not developed enough to sufficiently judge the affect of this action on their life.

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What did the speech impaired man say ? Nothing.

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A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

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what does michael jackson do to little boys? nothing, he's dead.

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Your dick is short, If we compare it to mine. That was it, Thank you for your time.

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Whats the difference between a lemon and an ant? They're both yellow except for the lemon.

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There are two men waiting in line at the supermarket. One of the men reaches forwards and taps the other one on the shoulder. He says, "You dropped your wallet.". He picks up his wallet and both of the men continue on with their day.

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If one train is heading North at 60 mph, na danother train is heading South at 45 mph, how many waffles are on the roof? The answer is purple, because aliens like coffee.

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What is a baby chick after 9 days old? 10 days old.

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what's worse than biting into an apple with a worm in it~? lots of things.

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why was the little girl crying in her dads arms? Because he was strangling her

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So a 12 year old suicide bomber walks in to a military base and kills 31 soldiers. It happened. Look it up.

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What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A pilot.... ya' damn racist!

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how do you confuse a blond? put them in a circle room and tell them to sit in the corner

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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