How did the blonde reply to the male man when he asked how she was? "I'm good."

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Who told the gorilla he couldn't go to the ballet? The people who were in charge of making that decision.

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Why was the boy drinking toilet water? Because he was receiving a violent swirly. He then went home and killed himself.

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what do you call a baby in a blender? A really funny event.

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Why did the white man cross the road? To pay his taxes.

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It was Valentines Day today, I thought I should get her something... I brought flowers to her grave.

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tommy is retared

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3 strangers were locked in a dark room they turned the light on, unlocked the door and proceeded with their day.

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Bob: Hey Jim, what's up? Jim: Obviously the sky, oh and i see a few planes too. by the way why are you asking me why don't you just look up?

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What do you call a black man with a wooden leg? A veteran.

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Q: What did the littl boy with cancer get for christmas? A: Nothing, he didnt make it that far.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black.

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when geese fly in a v formation, why is one side always longer then the other? Because you touch yourself at night...

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What did a fireman say to his wife right after they got ran over by a stampede of bulls? nothing.... they were dead.

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How long did it take the world's most powerful democracy to elect a black President? Less than a day.

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what taste like an apple, looks like an apple, but isnt an apple? an apple.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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david weres the slug gone

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What's worse than losing a contact Having a bloody stool

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What/s funnier than 24 dead Jews? 25 dead Jews. What/s funnier than 25 dead Jews? 6 million dead Jews. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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I've got ninety-nine problems, all of them very diverse and possibly involving women.

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What did the fly say when he went to Dunkin Donuts? Can I have a doughnut?

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What do you get when you mix carbonated water, caramel color, aspartame, phosporic acid, potassium benzoate, caffeine, citric acid, and natural flavor? Diet Pepsi

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roses are red violets are blue most poems rhyme but this one doesnt

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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