- Anti Joke

When Chuck Norris does a push up, he pushes himself up which puts resistance on his arms and therefore strengthens his arm muscles and performs physical exercise.

Mitt Romney

What's more traumatising than watching your dad raping a man? Watching a man raping your dad.

Today i started to think lucas was homosexuaI.. I am scared

A dyslexic agnostic insomniac stays up at night wondering if there's a dog.

There are four worms moving in a straight line, one in front of the other. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied.

Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

How else can an Asian wear a contact lens? Too bad for them. They can;t sucks for them. Asians with small eyes EXCEPT FOR INDIANS look ugly

Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere.

What did the man do after he got in his car with out his keys? He started it up and drove Away

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

What does Helen Keller's parents do when she gets in trouble? They leave the plunger in the toilet!!!

The woman says : OMG I am so hung over!! The man next to her has Terrible tourertts turns around and shouts I want my to make them hung over your face, her then moves away and rapes a apple of which he is eating, the woman turns around and dies as she has a brain tumor

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

I take the "the" out of Psychotherapist

Why did the little boy die? He had cancer.

What happened to the baby in the microwave? I don't really remember, I was too busy jacking off.

Knock Knock Who's there? Gestapo.

Why did the elephant not do 9/11? Because he drank a hispanic turtle.

You know what's the least funniest part about cancer? I am about to die in about a month or so.

What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.

Your Mom!!!

What's the difference between a cult leader and a television personality? On average, 3.2 inches.

Ask me if I'm a grapefruit. Are you a grapefruit? No.

Q: Why did the black guy cross the road? A: Hell, I don't know. He probably stole something.