69 :)

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? When 6 was just a young boy living in a quaint suburbial town, his family, 1 2 3 4 and 5 were all killed by 7. 7 then burned down their house while 6 ran away from the blazing inferno he used to call home. 6 was forced to live off the land in order to survive. 6 built a house using only mud and sticks and a little elbow grease. When 7 heard the news that 6 was still alive and well in the forest, 7 went into the woods, tracked down 6's home and again burned it down. When 6 came back from a day of fishing and a handfull of fish, he saw that his house was burned down. The fish then escaped from his hands, and flew away. 7 had left a note on the ground that said 7. 6 then recalled the first time 7 had killed his family and burned down house. 7 had now burned down two of 6's houses. That is why 6 is afraid of 7.

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if your paddling a backwards canoe up a waterfall and it loses its wheel, how many pancakes does it take to fill a dog house? the answer is 17 because aliens are allgeric to cows and mustard.

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A man with Tourette's syndrome walks into a bar. Because of his disease, he shouts unexpected profanities across the room, and everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the humiliation anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom, pulls out a gun, and points it at his head. His wife walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and he notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to make. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. Shocked and afraid, he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentenced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man still suffers from Tourette's and cannot control his ticks and rots in jail. He continues to scream random obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

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What's worse than finding out you have cancer? Nothing... (The game.)

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Three men are all in a car park and they all want the same parking spot. As it turns out, it was a trolley bay

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What do you call a puppy with one eye, one ear, and one leg? An ugly mother f*cker.

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How did the prisoner escape from prison? He asked to leave.

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What is it too late to do? Apologize...

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Q: Whats the biggest lie? A: The Cake...

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Why was Sally rolling in the grass? She was on fire.

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What did the black man get for Kwanza? AIDS

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There once was a baby named Paul Bunyan who was as big as a house. His mother died at childbirth.

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because as an animal with legs it is highly capable of doing such as it pleases.

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What's the difference between a fat boy and a thin boy? Fizzy drinks!

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Oh...okay, good.

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Q. you know who is so sad A. you for looking up a site for jokes that aren't even good

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what do you call a man who is addicted to alcohol... an alcoholic

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Q: Why can you not thumb up your own comment? A: "You've already voted" douche...

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Roses are red Violets are red Tulips are red Bushes are red Trees are red OH SH*T MY GARDEN IS ON FIRE!!!!!

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The world ends and everyone dies exept for a laywer

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What happens when you divide by 0? Sadly, you don't.

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Why did Hunter cross the road? No one cares, unless he gets hit.

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When is it unlucky to see a black cat? When you are a mouse.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops