cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer

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Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling.

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Why did the guy crash? He was texting.

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42

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A father of four joins the military. He returns home after his service.

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why didn't the donkey go to the party? Because, unfortunately he did not have the required linguistic skills to communicate with the person inviting. This is obviously dependent on whether the person who invited him was a human, if it was another donkey then perhaps this would of happened. However, this is also very unlikely as donkeys do not have parties or really communicate

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"One day this man walks out of his house to go to work. He sees this snail on his porch. So he picks it up and chucks it over his roof, into the back yard. Snail bounces off a rock, cracks its shell all to ****, and lands in the grass. Snail lies there dying. But it doesn't die. It eats some grass. Slowly heals. Grows a new shell. And after a while it can crawl again. One day the snail up and heads back to the front of the house. Finally, after a year, the little guy crawls back on the porch. Right then, the man walks out to go to work and sees this snail again. So he says to it, 'What the f uck's your problem?'" -Training Day

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What did the fly say to the frog? Nothing, insects can't talk.

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you're mommas so fat that her doctor says she is morbitly obese and may die of a heart failure later in life

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What did the doctor say to his wife? We have grown apart over the years, I want a divorce.

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A nuclear device is dropped on hiroshima. Does it make a sound? The answer is yes because the americans are laughing in Enola Gay

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soccer

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whats green and has wheels grass and i lied about the wheels

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what did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? cancer

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Knock, Knock? Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Why are you crying? I'm not crying. Oh.

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Roses are red Violets are blue In Soviet Russia Poem make YOU!

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he was greeting his new neighbors that moved in across the street. He was very friendly.

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You life story is the perfect cure for insomnia. [L]

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Whats worse than it raining on your birthday? 911

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A neutron walks into a bar. He orders a drink and ponders why his mother gave him the name, "A neutron."

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Daym im romantic

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What do you call a muslim flying an airplane? A pilot.

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What do you call a man with one ear? A one-eared man.

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So much with being an author... You with the Feds? The CIA?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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