Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey.

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What's the difference between a baby and a trampoline? I take off my shoes when i jump on a trampoline.

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Christianity

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Two Jewish men walk into a bar...just kidding it was a gas chamber.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Can you pass the soda? Sure.

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A man is walking on the beach, he trips on a mystical lamp and dusts i off a little. turns out that it was just a lamp, he droped it back on the sand and was arrested for littering.

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When do you know when to stop making anti- jokes? when your done with your joke and click submit.

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What do you call an Oliver with friends? A dream

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what do you throw at a mexican man when he is drowning? his family.

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What do you think 3 black men want when the come and knock on your car window? They just want directions.

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What's black and white and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

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you know why people who read anti-jokes are stupid? i just had the greatest sex ever!!

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If life gives you lemons, squeeze it in life' s eyes.

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Why do girls not have penises? Because there girls

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whats worse than a dead baby two dead babies what could be worse than that? constapation

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Why did the kid eat his homework because the teacher said it was a piece of cake

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Q: Why did the black man break into the house? A: Because he was poor and couldn't afford his daughters cancer treatment.

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What do you get if you cross a nan and a car? A squashed dead nan who released their bowels and your grandads face who was also dead as they had a cardiac arrest

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What kind of cheese isn't yours Nacho Cheese actually it depends on the type of cheese that you stole due to your kleptomania

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Why did twenty mexicans run down a hill? There was a marathon in the area.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Theres a crazy ass alpaca ready to take a shit on you

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Q. What did the wierd kid get for christmas A. A Pokemon diamond edition

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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What did the blind man say to the bartender? Nothing, I forgot to mention he's also mute and has no legs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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