Why did the boy want to sleep in the same bed as his parents? His bedroom was on fire.

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What is it too late to do? Apologize...

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knock knock no ones home

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Q: How many dead babies can you fit into a bathtub? A: Depends on the size of the tub and the size of the babies.

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A Mexican, a black man and a Pakistani walk into a bar. Everyone immediately runs out seeing the potential danger in the situation that's about to unfold.

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Why should people with Alzheimer's not tell jokes? To get to the other side.

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Your mother is average.

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A duck walks into a bar.... Duck: Can I have a glass of water? Bartender: How would you like to pay for it? Duck: Put it on my bill

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Q: What do you call a girl who wears a tuxedo to prom? A: Comfortable with the way she looks.

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a seal walks into a club.

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What do you call a black guy robbing a store ? A theif

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What did the squirrel say to Justin Bieber? We both enjoy nuts.

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Your mother is so fat that her BMI is larger than average.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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How do you get a priest to cry? Stab him.

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A duck walks into a bar, but he is kicked out because he is not 21

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Q: Why did the cheerleader drop her pom-poms? A: She was knocked unconscious from behind and repeatedly sodomized by a convicted rapist.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The horses name was Friday.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks him, "Would you like a drink?". The horse cannot understand english and is confused by its surroundings. The horse gallops out of the bar knocking over a few stools

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spell backwards: taco cat

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What does Helen Keller's parents do when she gets in trouble? They leave the plunger in the toilet!!!

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What do you call a boy with no arms? Names.

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There are two muffins in an oven. The first muffin says, "Is it just me, or is it getting hot in here?". The second one says, "Hey, look! A talkin' muffin!".

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CRY

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops