What did the apple say to the pear? Fred, you are going insane and i'm getting a divorce.

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your momma so fat, that she secretly crys every night, because she is so self concious about her weight. and has to talk to a therapist because shes bolemic and has suicidal thoughts, because she cant stand the way she looks

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an englishman,scotsman,and irishman walk into a bar the englishman says " a pint of lager please" "that will be 10pounds , says the barman "Im not paying that , ill see you in court" says the englishman . The same thing happens , in turn to the scotsman, and irishman ,and a summons is issued. In court the jugde says "why are you charging drinks too dear?" the barman says "im not, im selling them to a englishman ,scotsman, and a irishman..

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what happend when the AntiJoke Crossed the road? It pooped in the ... HIT BY A REFRIGERATOR.

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A hispanic walks down the street. ICE quickly arrests him, as he is here illegally. 5 months after deporting, he crosses the southern US border to try again.

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What did one wardrobe say to another wardrobe? Clothes.

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why did the boy get hit by a bus? because he was black

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Why did the girl kill herself? Because she was brutally raped

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The Game.

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What's worse than being a jew in the holocaust Being born black

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A tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it... Fall on top of a woman and crush her to death

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What did the elephant say to the poacher? Answer: Dear God in heaven, please don't kill me for my ivory.

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Your mama's so stupid that i wouldn't be surprised if you were to tell me that she didn't graduate high school.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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What did Jesus say to the giraffe? Good day to you sir.

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what did binladin say when he got to hell? oh no. im in hell

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What is black and white and red all over. A pile of dead zebras

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How do you blindfold an Asian person? Take a price of cloth and put it over his eyes

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Why did the boy cry Because he fell

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Why was the cook arrested? Tax evasion.

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Why did Peter go to the dentist? Because he had to go to the dentist!

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How do you kill a blue elephant? Shoot it with a blue shotgun How do you kill a pink elephant? Hold it's nose and shoot it with a blue shotgun.

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There's a fine line between hyphenated words

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A- knock knock B- whose there? A- Chuck Norris B- chuck norris who? A- are you retarded?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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