I like my women like I like my coffee, a brewed beverage prepared from the roasted seeds of an evergreen shrub of the genus Coffea.

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Why did the guy playing Monopoly sell Boardwalk for $100 to the woman wearing an exotic outfit which shows off her boobs but wouldn't sell Boardwalk for $1000 to the other person that was playing the game? The other person had Park Place as well which would have given them a monopoly on the blue property if he had sold it to that person. And $100 is all the girl had or he would have asked for more but he needed the $100 in order to pay this other player and keep himself from going bankrupt after landing on one of his Hotels.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Falafel. Falafel who? I falafel. You feel awful? Ha, ha, ha! Oh, what a kneeslapper! Oh, God! Thanks for the laugh, I was feeling a little down and I... No, I just meant I ate a falafel. Oh. Yeah.

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why is 6 afraid of 7? i don't know, ask 6

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1

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Why do Mexicans stink? Because they're Mexican.

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What did walt disney say to the Jew? Nothing. Walt Disney didn't know the man was Jewish and didn't have time to make himself acquainted with the fellow.

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how many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? one

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What do you call an Asian man in a car? A motorist.

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A duck walks into a bar.... Duck: Can I have a glass of water? Bartender: How would you like to pay for it? Duck: Put it on my bill

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Why wasn't the door a door? It was a jar.

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why was the blonde fired from the factory? she ate the maneger's fingers.

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What does the cookie monster and the blue man group have in common? They are both homosexually active

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What is it too late to do? Apologize...

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Knock Knock Not Yet

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Q: Who showed up at the dead soldier's funeral? A The Westboro Baptist Church...

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Knock knock, who's there? Doctor. Doctor who?

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What do you call a black scuba diver... A scuba diver.

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Little Justin's bike has a flat tire has a flat tire. He asks his dad to inflate it. "Sure Justin I can fix that for you." Said his father. But he overinflates the tire, causing the tire to explode and ignite the chemicals. The house burns to the ground, killing Justin and his parents. The fire then spreads and the hole city burns. 50,000 people die.

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A priest, a minister and a rabbit were seated next to each other on an airplane. They all had to pay for lunch.

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Roses are red, Violets at blue. My mind is twisted, Bend over bitch your about to get fisted.

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What happens when you divide by 0? Sadly, you don't.

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What is the difference between ashes and a jew? A lot

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Why didn't the woman make sandwiches? She was making baguettes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops