God has put a gate keeper at a gate in heaven to listen to how everyone has died. The first guy comes and says, "I thought my wife was cheating on me so when i came home I see this man hanging off my balcony, I thought he was the man cheating with my wife, so I then push him off, but he was still alive, so I threw a refrigerator onto him, that killed him, but I felt so guilty I soon commited suicide" The gates man said, "Wow thats terrible come in." Then the next guy come and he says how he died, "Well you see I was just oiling myself up for my workout, but I slipped, and fell off my 5th story balcony, and landed in some guys 3rd floor balcony I was hanging off the ledge, and a guy came I thought he was going to help me, but instead he pushed me of and threw a refrigerator on me." The guard let him in, and a third guy came. The Guard said,"Man its going to be hard to beat those guys their just sad. Ok how did you die?" The third man said, "Picture this I'm trapped in a refrigerator...

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Why couldn't the man see the camoflague iguana He could.

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.sdrawkcab siht gnidaer era ouy ,siht daer nac ouy fI

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?J?o?k?e?

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John Stamos.

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A dog walks into a bar. The bartender was just about to leave, so he takes the dog home with him. He makes found dog signs and posts them around the neighborhood. The owner sees one of the signs and retrieves his pet from the bartender, thanking him for finding his dog.

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Two Iranians walk into an airport They show their passports and proceed to fly to their home in Minnesota

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How to kill a mocking bird? Stab it

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there once was a man from Afghanistan. Who wanted to bang his brother-istan. they licked and sucked. and kissed then f**ked, he got aids. and never did that-again!

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Why did the hipster burn his tongue? He was in a terrible car crash in which the fuel tank exploded.

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Why were the 3 men wearing black suits? They just left their mothers funeral, she died of terminal cancer.

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What did tarzan say when he saw the elephants? Here come the elephants

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Roses are red the grass is green now open your legs and let me fill you with cream

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You know what makes no cents? 100 cents because 100 cents make a dollar.

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The Tiarajudens is a Permian land-walrus.

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Where did the taxi driver put his suitcase down? celery

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What do you call a dinosaur eating a taco? Nothing, you are high.

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A man goes and buys a head of cabbage. The cabbage had a worm in it. When the man saw the worm, he threw out the cabbage and bought a new one the next time he went to the grocery store.

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What happens when you divide by 0? Sadly, you don't.

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a room? A: Depends on how hard you can throw.

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(Pretend that your adopted, and no one loves you) Knock Knock Who's there? Not your parents.

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What do you call a baby that fell in lava Dead

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Do you know why I'm bored???? No why are you bored Because I am

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Why didn't the woman make sandwiches? She was making baguettes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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