Why did the door close? Because I closed it.

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what did binladin say when he got to hell? oh no. im in hell

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How do you blindfold an Asian person? Take a price of cloth and put it over his eyes

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Why was the cook arrested? Tax evasion.

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Why did Peter go to the dentist? Because he had to go to the dentist!

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Why did the boy cry Because he fell

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What is black and white and red all over. A pile of dead zebras

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What did Jesus say to the giraffe? Good day to you sir.

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Women's Rights

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Want to hear a funny joke Rojo Bunchie

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A- knock knock B- whose there? A- Chuck Norris B- chuck norris who? A- are you retarded?

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What's long, hard and full of semen? An erect penis prior to ejaculation.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I threw it after I chopped its' head off.

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Jewwy Jewstein

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What do you call a dog with no legs? A dog with no legs

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What's the difference between a boodle and a scoodle? Ladoodle!

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What did the octopus say to the squid? Nothing, considering these two species can't speak.

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How many black guys does it take to change a light bulb? One.

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amy baked 35 sugar cookies and ate 25, what does she have now? diabetes.

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Two friends that are 11 years old are fighting with each other, and one of them says, " Shut the front door." The other friend replies, "We don't even have a front door, because we're both homeless, and we're never going to be adopted because we're on an island, that's how we became friends in the first place."

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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Who has a big nose? YOU!!!

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What did the pear say to the apple? Fred, you delusions are getting worse and i'm getting a divorce.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops