what did the girl said to the stalker? i dont know cuz if i did, i would be a stalker

thumb_up thumb_down -10

ask me if im a fence are you a fence WALNUTS!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Who paved the road? The fat guy with the steam roller

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Roses are read Vilots are blue, I have a gun, Now get out of my house!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock. Knock. Whos there? Not Sarah.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

out of your comfort zone

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the book fly to Cambodia? It was on a plane that was delivering educational material to third world countries to enhance their schools and increase their literacy.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you call a bitchy unreliable friend? You don't call that bitch at all.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

holocaust is bad but its funny when you use it as a joke hehe

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's black and sits in the back of a police car? The seat.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Yeah, Eliza, its me, its so strange, you are the only one I remember from highschool, I was worried you had forgotten about me, anyway, yeah type as if you where speaking to him, and dont worry, I know I could not keep a secret back then, and I told Nero, so and he promised me he would kindly break my fingers if I told anyone, besides I dont do that anymore trust me.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What happend to the Jew when he was near the fire place He very carefully tended to it

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A man became infected with Staphylococcal Food Poisoning. The doctor said, "You only have 24 hours to live." He died 24 hours later.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do a Jew and a homeless man both have in common? They both get nothing for Christmas

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did the Asian store clerk say to the midget? yay penis

thumb_up thumb_down -12

why did the guy make a deer and and bear mix because he wanted some beer

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Two pretzels were walking down the street. One was assaulted. The other, witnessing what he'd seen, developed a harsh stereotype.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why can't you look at the sun? Because it's 2.00 AM

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the man rape the woman? He had a lapse in judgement.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

why does jake have so many guns? hes compensating

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Two scuba divers are playing cards on the bottom of the ocean. One asks "have you got amy threes?" Then they both die from maintained exposure to the incredible pressure at the bottom of the sea. One left behind three children.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? I don't know considering it was never done before, and that the size of the pancake would have to be taken into account. Although I would suggest you use a better material like wood, plastic, or metal.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

why did the chicken cross the road? regardless of the fact his job at kfc was there, he felt that exercise was need to work off is thighs

thumb_up thumb_down -12

2 nuns in the bath, One says "wears the soap" the other says "Over there, next to the shampoo"

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops