more like nig!

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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How do you blindfold an Asian person? Take a price of cloth and put it over his eyes

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What happened when Sally got hit by a truck? WHO CARES CALL 911!!!!

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What's greasier than a baby? A burger

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Why does Santa Clause eat cookies? Because cookies not part of a balanced diet.

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look this kid up on facebook and spam him!! its funny, Josh Noonan, also his cell number is 603 560 3399....

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Dracula." "Dracula who?" He pulls his cape up to his face and says, "May the force be with you,"

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why did the kid with no legs get eaten by wolves? he couldn't get away

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whats a mexicans favorite sport? cross counrty

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What looks red and smells like barf? Depends on how you look at the situation.

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Q. whats red and sits in a hairdressers? A. a baby getting its hair cut with a potato peeler

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Mario goes home after a hard day of work and finds his entire family killed and a note from Bowser... He is now an asshole who beats and rapes kids...

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An atheist dies and so will we all, eventually.

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What's the best joke in the world? This one.

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Doctor Doctor! I think i'm epileptic! I'm not the Doctor, I'm the receptionist. You're a hypochondriac, now wait in the Que, like everybody else Mrs. Davis.

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what do dead babies and turkeys have in common? you eat them on ocasions

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why was it sad that 3 men were crossing rail road tracks in a toyota and got hit by a train? they ruined the Toyota

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What do you call a dog with no legs? A dog with no legs

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what do you call a bee that makes milk? A BOObee

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Why can't the toucann fly anymore? Because they're extinct

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Why did Sally fall of the swing? She had Down-Syndrome.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he was peckish.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops