what do you get when you combine a vampire,werewolf,and whiny girlfriend ....... the worst show in the history of the earth

thumb_up thumb_down -7

The seven dwarves sat around the house feeling Grumpy, so Grumpy left.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did Batman say to Superman? Nothing, he killed him with a kryptonite spear.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do you call a person with no arms or legs rolling around in leaves? I don't know that seems like a highly improbable situation

thumb_up thumb_down -7

what is the difference between peanut butter and a dead baby? dead babies dont stick to the roof of your mouth when you are eating them.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

(In a job interview) Interviewer: Name a time when you've failed sometime Me: I failed an HIV test last June, anything else?

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q: What happened to the dead baby? A: It was Buried

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did peter fall off his bike? Because Peter is a goldfish.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A man with ADD walks into a bar, what did he say? Look a squirrel!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why are there no swimming pools in Mexico? The average yearly income is $3,523, and pool chemicals are very expensive.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the girl kill herself? Because she was brutally raped

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why was the anti joke funny? because it wasn't funny.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A kangeroo is stuck in a tree with no headlights, how many waffles does it take to get to the moon? NO, silly. Snakes don't have armpits.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

two scientists walk into a bar. one says, "i want h2o." the other says, "i want h2o too." the bartender gives them both water and nobody dies because he is not irresponsible enough to give someone concentrated hydrogen peroxide as a drink.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Whats worse then biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into an apple and finding half a worm. Wats worse then biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Biting into an eggplant and finding half a worm, as eggplants are usually more expensive so you will have wasted more money and would probably not be willing to eat the rest. And eggplants taste like shit.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Rose are Red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers The middle one is for you.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the mute guy say to the deaf guy? Nothing. He can't talk, just makes awful noises and hand gestures.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q. why did the plane crash? A. because the pilot was a loaf of bread

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What is black, white and red all over? Many things.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Knock Knock. Whose there? ..............

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why were the teacher's eyes crossed? She got kicked in the face by a mule.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Train A leaves the station at 1:42 while traveling in 176kmh. How long will it take for the conductor to realize the bridge it ou... Too long.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops