getting up in the morning is the 3nd hardest thing :DDD

How do you get a clown off of a swing? Hit him with an ax.

what's the difference between "rita , sue and bob too ," and rocky II ? rocky II is about boxing

Roses are grey Violets are gray Imma dog

What's white and looks like paper? Paper

A horse walks into a bar, it broke both its legs and was then put down.

If a canoe is stuck in a tree with its headlights on, howmany pancakes does it take to cover the roof of my house? False, snakes don't have armpits!

A Haitian walks into a bar. It collapses.

Three men walked into a bar. None were injured because they were all wearing hard hats as is the procedure for a construction site.

On a scale of 1 to 10, 7 being the highest, what is you favorite color

What's the difference between a Corvette and a sack of dead babies? I don't have a Corvette in my garage.

What do you call a boy with no arms? Names.

why couldnt james zatts swim? he was half black

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have to use the bathroom.

What separates man from animal? Divorce.

why did the monkey cross the road? it escaped from a local zoo a block away

Your momma is so old that she might die soon!

Any similarity between Jesse and a human is purely coincidental!

heads up!

Why was the mushroom invited to the party? Because the party was a rave and some mushrooms are know to make the consumer of them hallucinate wildly.

how do you kill Lady Gaga? with a gun.

What's the sexiest thing on a farm? It depends on what you find sexy, and your personal perception of a farm.

What do you do when a hispanic man takes your wallet? Ask him to please give the wallet back to you

Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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