What happens when you give someone a free chocolate bar? ThEeyroast it and vapourise it intheir hands....no they eat it

Knock knock, Who's there? The police, you have committed 14 major felonies and you are being arrested.

Your mamas so old she died of old age, R.I.P.

What did the ginger say to the blond? Hello, what is your name?

Women's Rights.

How did Barry Bonds break the career homerun record? A combination of natural ability, practice, and a plethora of performance enhancing drugs.

What's worse than a fly in your soup? Getting killed in a plane crash.

Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because, the farmer lacked basic fence mending skills.

What did the person with down syndrome do? He mumbled for a while, chewed on his thumb, fell flat on his face, and died.

Yo mamma is so fat She has to wear big pants and is easily fatigued.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple. finding two worms in your apple. and being an orphan.

Why don't people say YOLO anymore? They all died in car crashes while texting and driving.

This is a haiku A lovely type of poem It's snowing on Mt. Fuji

Why wasn't the black man allowed on the golf course? Because a wealthy business man had rented out the entire course for a very important international investor.

How did the chicken know where he was going? He had a map.

It's the police sir. There's been an accident.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have AIDS we're dying together

Why was the man late for work? Because he slept in.

Why didn't the black man eat a packet of crisps? Because he didn't have any.

A boy bought a dozen roses, eleven real, one fake. He looks deeply into his girlfriends eyes, hers looking back, brimming with love and affection as he says, "I slept with your sister."

How many lemurs does it take to paint a wall It depends on how hard you throw them Why did Jane fall off the swing She has no arms Why did Jack drop his ice cream cone He got hit by a bus Did you know that if you pretend to eat salt you can actualy taste it Do this in public. Why was 6 afraid of 7 Numbers can't think This is the original anti joke A man walked into a bar he is an alcoholic and is distroying his family. Fin a penny pick it up and all the day you will have good luck Until you get hit with a car door. A man is SCUBA diving when he is almost out of air so he takes one breath an holds it to the surface The trip is so long that his lungs explode do to a change in pressure so he died.

Cornelius went to the dcotor and got a sticker and a lollipop for being a good patient. He later went home and shoved the lollipop stick up his dick hole and started wildly masturbating. I forgot to mention Cornelius was 42 years old.

what do you call a blonde with black hair? Artificial intelligence

hi

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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