why did the fat guy become fat ...COD..

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Whats black and white and musty? A nuns pussy because it never gets used.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Q: What's soft, fuzzy, and lives in the woods? A: Yeti

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A Trampoline.

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What is the answer to the question of Life, the Universe and Everything? That doesn't make any sense.

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What did Jean Luc Picard say to Data when he saw a broken Janome Overlocker? Make it Sew

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Nature is filled with wondrous things. No really, this isn't a joke.

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A man walks into a bar and probably sustains serious head injuries and possibly a concussion as most bars are usually made out of solid metals such as iron or steel and is therefore not permitted by his doctor to engage in sports or other rigorous activities for an allotted period of time depending on the degree of his injury.

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what do u call a kid with autism? a autistic s.o.b or Hennon bart

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what did the tree say to the other tree? Don't leaf me!

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Two Holocausts.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Actually, now that i think of it, roses come in many colors And violets are actually violet in color, thus the name

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What was Hatsune Miku's last word? bokuwaumaresoshitekizukushosenhitonomanegotodatoshittenaomoutaitsuzukutowanoinochivocaloidtatoesoregakisonkyokuwonazoruomochanarabasoremoiitoketsuinegiwokajirisorawomiageshiruwokobosudakedosoremonakushikizukijinkakusurautanitayorifuanteinakibannomotokaerutokowasudenihaikyominaniwasuresararetatokikokororashikimonogakietebousounohatenimieruowarusekaivocaloid...

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I'm on the ABC diet. The ABC stands for: Americans British Chinese I eat humans.

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Why is it sad that a black guy died in a car crash He was my friend

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Q: On a plane, a black man does not grab a bag of peanuts, while everyone else does. Why? A: He has allergies.

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Knock knock Who's there? Illiteracy.

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Why did the cow cross the road? It was escorted by its owner to get to the slaughter-house.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Meals on wheels - eat up!

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A lawyer gets admitted to a bar.

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what did the cat say to the monkey meow then he got hit by a car

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have cancer Nutella on muffin

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If life gives you lemons, steal the declaration of independance and use the lemons and a hair dryer to reveal the numbers on the back. Then enbark on an epic journey that ends with the discovery of the templars treasure. Lastly, use the money you earned to buy some lemons and make some lemonade.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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