Steven Hawking walks into a bar everyone is amazed because the surgery he just got cured his parilization

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What happened to him after he died? He got buried.

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Why is the beach always so angry? The beach is just sand and waves and lacks sentience, but makes up for it in crabs.

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Why is evan a lil poop? cause he pooped my poop all the pooping ;)

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snooki

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Scrub that muck off at once Hubert Cumberdale!

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A Muslim walked into a bar....nothing happened

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A Cadillac Escalade ran off a cliff with 4 black man in it. What's wrong with this? The Cadillac could hold 6 people.

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A man walks into his house only to find someone in the livingroom touching the stereo. He then goes up to his wife, and kisses her.

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On the dora show when they asked where the Monster was why did the arrow point left instead of right?? Because it was scared

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Why do I have a Virtual Boy?

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What did the mouse say to the elephant that sat on him? Nothing, he died on impact.

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Q: What's funnier than a baby in a blender? A: A baby in a clownsuit in a blender.

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Two men walk into a bar. They get drunk.

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"Lets begin, tell me about yourself," "ok, well first I'm a open book and..." "ok next" "why?" "I fucking hate books!"

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A man walks into a bar and says "I'd like a beer."

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A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and mop. In turns out the bartender was a paranoid schizophrenic and was hallucinating.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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A boy was crying. He had been abused and beaten by his parents, and thrown in his room. He was devastated, and wanted to kill himself. He tossed and turned in bed, and moaned himself to sleep. When he awoke, he felt a chill up his spine, noticing that all of his blankets had been torn off of his bed, leaving only him and his mattress. He open the window, and jumped out of his three story building. Luckily, his bedroom was on the first floor. He ran away, and found a rich family that loved him so much until a week later, a murderer came and killed everyone, including him.

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Q. Why did the fat boy cross the road? A. To go on a diet

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Jack be nimble, Jack be quick... Jack didn't make it over the candle stick and died.

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What did Tyrone Jenkins say when Obama was elected? Nothing. He is not a real person, but merely a hypothetically existent man used only for the portrayal of a lacking punchline.

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Q:How do you know if you have a big enough oven? A: If the jew fits

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What is worse than 10 babys in 1 garbage can? 1 baby in 10 garbage cans.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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