What did the circle say to the square? Ur a square

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what did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? cancer

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Hey Jew. What? Shut up.

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Brian finally kissed a girl on the lips... After her daily whore shift of blowjobs -Ap

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A penguin is walking through the snow, and comes across a polar bear with a hat on. He stops and stares at the polar bear for a second and then compliments the polar bear on his hat. The polar bear smiles and promptly consumes the penguin, building up a fat layer for the coming Winter.

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What do you call a man with one ear? A one-eared man.

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Jesus steps out of a boat, and walks across the water to shore. He's such a show of. Only an attention whore would leave a boat and walk across water for no good reason.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Reclu. Reclu who? Recluse Spider.

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casey, that is all, ruddel, that is all, hi mark

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A:Hi, do you like to blow bubbles? B:Yea... A:Hi, my names bubbles

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Joker: say knock knock. Person: knock knock Joker: Who's there?

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Why are fire trucks red Well fire trucks have 4 wheels, and they have 8 people in them, 4+8, is 12, there are 12 inches in a foot, a foot is a ruler, Queen Elizabeth was a ruler, Queen Elizabeth was a boat, boats sail the seven seas, fish are in the seven seas, fish have fins, the Finns defeated the Russians, Russians are red, And that is why fire trucks are red.

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Whats the easiest way to get a dumb blond to have sex with you? rape.

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What do you call a muslim flying an airplane? A pilot.

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Whats worse than it raining on your birthday? 911

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Knock knock. I know who is there... What? No, I lied...

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How many jews does it take to- I have alzheimers

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What did the robet say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. Its funny cuase the robot had no arms.

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A Blonde arives at the airport late, and misses her flight. The airline provides her with a complimentary ticket for a later flight and she departs on that.

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Yo mama so fat! She should be concerned because diabetes is a serious problem that can lead to a heart attack. Also STOP EATING MCDONALDS.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a serial rapist.

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Why are cats mammals? Because they are descended from primordial mammals in the distant past which are the common ancestors of all mammals.

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Why did a boy fall off the swing at a playground? He did not have any arms.

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All this fuss about drink driving is a load of crap! I frequently drink and drive, and I've never had an accident, apart from one small collision in which my wife was paralysed from the neck down.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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