How many kids with ADHD does it take to fix a lightbulb? Lets go ride bikes.

A ninja walked into a dojo and was kindly greeted by his master.

Want to hear a joke? Me neither.

what do you call a man with no arms or legs sitting at your doorstep? matt what do you call a man with no arms or legs floating in the water? bob what do you call a man that just had his daughter taken away from him? ...sam

Why couldn't Hellen Keller watch TV? Because at 19 months she contracted what is believed to be scarlet fever which caused an acute congestion of the stomach and brain which caused her to loose sight and hearing.

Thank you so much Nero, I have read it and I am crying because I am happy, at first I was worried because I have never cried out of happiness before. But its over. Nero, you underestimate yourself a lot, promise me we will work with that together, sometimes you almost convince me you are as inferior as you say, but then you get out of your shell of doubt your past has caused in you (its not you when you doubt yourself its what they put in you), you are always there when people need you, teach me hypnosis someday and let me remove that part of you which does not allow you to believe in yourself. Dont reply Nero, calm down and sleep, I feel you are allright, I just know.

What's the answer to all your problems The answer

Steve, what do I write on a 3946 if more than two vehicles were involved?

How do you circumsize a redneck? Kick his sister in the jaw.

goats are like mushrooms, if you shoot a duck, im scared of toasters

Why did the lady have a birthmark on her leg? Because she came out of her mother's leg.

Roses are red, Facebook is blue, no mutual friends, WHO THE HELL ARE YOU!?!?

why did jenny fall off the swing? because she had no arms Knock Knock Whos there? not jenny

Why dont black people go on cruise ships Theyre not falling for that one again

Yo mamma is so fat her blood type is RAGU

-my friend Cassie is coming over - oh is she cute? -yea but she's not my type -oh that's understandable then

I'm on a seafood diet. It consists of prawns and tuna.

why was ej's penis hard? because he had just got done having fine exquisit sex which he had ejaculated with a sturn body builder name frank who he had been seeing for the past few months.

Daddy look! Roses! No son, those are rhododendrons... Daddy how do you spell rhododendrons? Uh... never mind son those are roses. So... Daddy how do you spell roses? Son, never mind that is a dog. So daddy how do you spell... SHUT UP! Moral: I put a spell on you.

Q.what do you call 7x7 A.A math equation

What did dick Cheney say to his friend that he accidentally shot in the face while quail hunting? Sorry for shooting you in the face

-Will you follow the live coverage of 86th Acacemy Awards? -No. -Are you anti-semitic?

Where's a bad place to park your car? In a no-parking zone

Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because its head is so far away from its body.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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