Why can't black people be astronauts? Institutionalized racism.

what did batman say to robin before they got into the batmibile "get in the batmoblie"

what did the crow say do the dead gazelle? - nothing the crow ate it

What does andy and burger king have in common? Nothing, thats why she is now banging josh!

Two scientists walk into a bar. The first one says, "I'll have some H20" and the second one says, "I'll have some H20 too." The second scientist dies after drinking hydrogen peroxide.

What did the Mexican say to the Pirate? Can I have a pound for my bus, pal?

Whats green, lies in a ditch, and is covered in cookie crumbs? A girl scout that got hit by a car

how did the jewish man die He had a fatal hard attack

What did the sick kid say to Make a Wish foundation? To get better

Me Neither.

Little Timmy walks into an ice-cream store. He dies on impact.

Why couldn't the fireman get over the hill? Because he was dead.

Q. why did the blonde stare at the orange juice carton? A. it said concentrate.

What did the cannibal eat for breakfast? Waffles.

How do you kill a blonde? Drench her in fluoroantimonic acid and watch her explode in a violent and gruesome death.

What does one call black men pushing a car up a hill? Black Car. What does one call white men pushing a car up a hill? White Car. What does one call Mexicans pushing a car up a hill? Grand Theft Auto

Roofs are Red...I have a Cunt!!!

Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

Why did the penis enter the vagina? They were trying for a baby

What do you call a person who is black? A black person.

Why cant t-rexes clap their hands? They no longer exist

What would happen if RAINN Wilson, the actor, married Michael MANN, the director? They'd probably be arrested; 2 men can't get married in California anymore (thanks a lot, Utah)!

charlie sheen losing

OK, so there's this blonde driving down the road in her brand new, candy-apple red, $125,000 Lamborghini. She's cruisin' about 95, radio blaring, having a great time. She comes up on this trucker who is carrying a double-wide home and is taking up both lanes. To her disliking, he is only going about 45. To get the point across that she wants to get past, she decides to tailgate him. So, she gets to within a foot of his rear bumper. The trucker looks back and sees her on his ass, and motions for her to get off of it, but to her it looks like a wave and she waves back. Since her first attempt was futile, she decided to get a little closer and begin flashing her headlights, hopefully making herself more visible in the process. Once again the trucker sees her on his ass, and this time motions for her to pull over to the side of the road. The trucker steps out of his vehicle with a chunk of chalk and draws a circle three feet in diameter in the middle of the road. He instructs her not to move until he tells her to. Naive as she was, she agrees to it and steps inside it. The trucker goes back to his truck and pulls out a 50-ounce Louisville Slugger. He walks over to the Lamborghini and beats it, and beats it, and beats it again. When he is done, all that is left is a brand new, candy-apple red, $125,000 pile of metal. Satisfied, he throws the bat in his truck and walks over to the blonde. When he gets there, to his astonishment, she is rolling around on the street laughing hysterically. He asks her, "Why are you laughing? I just beat the crap out of your car!!" She is laughing too hard to respond, but between giggles he can make out, "While you weren't looking I stepped out of the circle."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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