Q. What did the man say when he beat his video game? A. "I beat my video game." Q. What did the man say after his favorite sports team missed the playoffs? A. "My favorite sports team missed the playoffs." Q. What did the man say when a murderer was in his house? A. Nothing. He was dead.

One time at band camp, We practice playing our instruments and had fun.

What do Abraham Lincoln and George Washington have in common? They both had beards, except for Washington.

What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

What did the astronaut say at AA? Alcohol is ruining my life.

What do you call a blank white sheet of paper? Printer paper most likely

Why do Christian protest against gay marriage? They protest because they believe gay marriage is a sin.

Are yu mad Twinkle twinkle little star if yu don't shut up I'm gonna hit you with my freaking car

Wanna know how to confuse a blonde? No. I wanna know which way you would prefer to die.

what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: Wheres my tractor?

Q. How many babies does it take to paint a room? A. Depends on how hard you throw them.

A blonde walks into a bar ouch

Why did the chicken cross the road? So he could be slaughtered and eaten for dinner.

Q: What's the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? A: I don't have a Porsche in my garage. But I don't have a pile of dead babies either. So, yeah.

the danced cus they were young, they danced cus they were free, but mostly the danced cus they needed to pee

What's three times as dangerous than a war? Three wars.

What smells bad and is black, A very dirty dead decomposing body.

The Earth is a nice place to live.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Sally.

roses are red violets are blue last time i dropped something this hard it ended world war 2?

What did the monkey say to the receptionist? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

There are two cows standing in a wide, green field eating hay. The first cow says: "Moo". The second cows says: "Thats funny, I was about to say that."

How do you spell "black" when you writing an african american history essay. B L A C K

Yo mama so fat! Really she should get on an exercise program and watch her diet, as she is at higher risk for diabetes and other health issues

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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