What did the little girl with cancer get for Christmas? Chemotherapy.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had three balls.

You know I can, and I already have, as once the mind knows its getting certain medications, it spends the energy required in order to achieve the effect, this is what psychiatrists and those assholes would call "psychological effect". With that said, I am still tired, and the stimulants are waking up my ouchies too, so I think ill get some sleep and dont worry, I can sleep with any stimulants as long as I can use my mind. By the way, my "hypnosis senses" are not hypnosis by themselves, but in order to hypnotize oneself and other, one must learn to read body language and stuff like that, something which I now do subconciously because I am experienced. Alice is calm again, her hands are shaking but she is cold, I am pretty sure she is far more tired than I am, so I kinda ordered her to go home, this guy can type for me. Just want you to know that I am doing fine now, and that the PTSD is much less severe than before as my brain no longer remembers the voice and looks my parents had back then, so I just feel my nose getting punched and breaking, its... Surprisingly annoying, so ill get some sleep, if nothing else it will help Alice get better, and I wont lie, I need it.

Who would win in a chess duel between Ender Wiggin and Artemis Fowl? Artemis Fowl will calculate the optimal path to move his pieces. Ender Wiggin will calculate the optimal path to kill the queen, so all the other pieces just sort of fall down.

Why i didn't bought the "Anti Joke The Book".. Because the joke in it aren't funny..

What do you call a deaf, blind socialist? Helen Keller.

Whats better than having 5 dollars? Having 5 dollars and a pizza

Hey I just met you, and your f$#king crazy,I ate your pizza, so go get me another one!!

What do Abraham Lincoln and George Washington have in common? They both had beards, except for Washington.

Whats has no comedic value? A brick

What do you call an asian pilot? A pilot you racist bastard

A blind guy and a priest walk into a bar

Why did the fridge cross the road? Because Sally has no arms

What do you call a larger individual having intense sex with a smaller individual? Rape.

The Rock: What is your name? Jeff: My name is... The Rock: IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT YOUR NAME IS!

Why did the old man cry? Because he had just witnessed his wife die.

What is white black and Chinese A panda

What is big, green, fuzzy, and would kill you if it fell on you? A pool table.

What's worse than losing your wallet? Having a miscarriage.

1 + 1 ? Hmm, I don't know, maybe 2 but I could be wrong.

What did the white teen say to the black man? Sup nigga. What then followed? A savage beating at which the teen did not survive.

Marrage s like a card game. You start off with 2 hearts and 1 diamond. You end up wishing for a club and a spade!

Here is an opposite. Black Santa Claus.

What did the hispanic man say to the black man? I don't know, if I was listening to their conversation, the would be creepy.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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