why is this joke funny because your laughing

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*Knock Knock* Who's there? It's Jeff. Hi there Jeff, come in, the doors open.

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cancer isn't that good for you. so try not to get it

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Why did the cow fall Cause a fat kid pushed him over

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What's worse than getting dumped? Being molested by a crazy hobo

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How do you disprove feminism? This is how I disprove feminism. I go up to a feminist and ask her, 'If there are penises, then why are there women?' I have never met a feminist who can say anything in response to my logic.

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Why did the woman cross the road? To welcome the new neighbors.

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Imagine a scenario Add a Rhubarb Crumble into your scenario Add your mother and father sitting together watching the news in your scenario. Your scenario should take place in an old people's home Add an Olympic athlete doing the splits into your scenario If there were any crane-flies in your scenario, be sure to subtract them at once. Divide your scenario by two. Your scenario should now be a mental image of flying horses and a hippopotamus eating a large salmon mousse. There will be a pig tied to a pair of sunglasses.

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An anorexic women walks into McDonalds

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guess what chicken butt

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Why did the man jump into the river? He wanted to go for a swim, but the pool was closed, so he swam in the river.

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If I have 7 oranges in one hand and 8 oranges in the other, what do I have? Big hands!

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What did david give back? Nothing.

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How could you wake up Lady Gaga? poke her face

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Why did FiddleBob Joe chuck a stick of butter out the window? Because he wanted to see a butter fly

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Did you just admit being considerate? I do not care about who gets the last comment anymore, I need to tear my face away from the screen ASAP.

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What did the old person find on the internet? Porn.

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Where do you find a good lawyer? In the cemetary

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Why was the white man chosen for the job over the black guy? He had more work experience and was clearly the better suited applicant.

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What did the Jewish man get for Christmas? Jews don't celebrate Christmas, therefore nothing

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Boo." "I don't know anyone by that name. Please go away." -Louis

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How do you scare a Jew Hold your lighter up and blow out the flame and I've toward him real slowly and see how much drama he'll cause

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In 2030, what will most people be doing for a living? Using food stamps.

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knock knock whose there? banana banana who? knock knock? whose there? banana knock knock? whose there? banana

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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