When life gives you lemons, you are probably crazy because life cannot give you lemons.

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What's the best thing about the Pixies? Their music.

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Q: How do you fit 30 Jews in one car? A: Two in the front, two in the back, and the rest in the ash tray.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen. Its was her funeral

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What do you do after a murder kills your entire family? Nothing, he killed you too

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What has a fiery tail and is mentally handicapped? Charetard.

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You know your in deep shit when you hit somebody in the head with a 2 by 4 and they dont go down.

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The guys Joke above me is funnier^.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why don't you ask the chicken. I am sorry but I as a human being am totally incapable of understanding and communicating with chickens.

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Why did the cow fall Cause a fat kid pushed him over

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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what did God say when He saw a black man? Oops I urnt one.

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Yo mama soooooo dumb! You should really take her to a doctor, she might actually suffer from mental retardation, I'm just concerned about her.

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chuck norris's daughter lost her virginity but he got it back

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Q: What do you call 10 black people in the ocean? A: A family having a good time on an exciting scuba diving tour.

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cancer isn't that good for you. so try not to get it

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why is this joke funny because your laughing

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*Knock Knock* Who's there? It's Jeff. Hi there Jeff, come in, the doors open.

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what did the chicken cross the road? because its a chicken

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guess what chicken butt

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How do you disprove feminism? This is how I disprove feminism. I go up to a feminist and ask her, 'If there are penises, then why are there women?' I have never met a feminist who can say anything in response to my logic.

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Why did the woman cross the road? To welcome the new neighbors.

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An anorexic women walks into McDonalds

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Imagine a scenario Add a Rhubarb Crumble into your scenario Add your mother and father sitting together watching the news in your scenario. Your scenario should take place in an old people's home Add an Olympic athlete doing the splits into your scenario If there were any crane-flies in your scenario, be sure to subtract them at once. Divide your scenario by two. Your scenario should now be a mental image of flying horses and a hippopotamus eating a large salmon mousse. There will be a pig tied to a pair of sunglasses.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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