Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He died! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was attached to the first! Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game! Why did the fridge fall out of the tree? The branch broke! Why did Sally fall off her bike? She got hit by three monkeys and a fridge!

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Why didn't the woman make sandwiches? She was making baguettes.

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What did batman say to robin before they got into the batmobile? Get in the batmobile.

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Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

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I really don't care how you dress at my funeral, I'll be dead!

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What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable? The wheelchair.

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Why couldn't the mexican buy a boat? Because he couldn't afford it

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Yo Mama is so dumb, that she scored significantly below average on the SAT's.

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What's black and hangs from the trees in my backyard? Black berries!

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ask me if I'm a tree.. are you a tree? no.

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Three men went into a bar; one was blind, another deaf and the third was mute. The blind guy said "Did you SEE that?" The deaf guy said "WHAT?" And the mute said "...."

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because having no sense of hearing or vision she is completely incapable of operating any sort of machinery.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Sorry, what? your door is kind of thick.

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Why did Jerry Sandusky appeal his conviction? Because the judge wrongly considered inadmissible evidence.

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My grandpa asked me a very important question right before he kicked the bucket. Grandpa: Son, how far do you think I could kick this bucket?

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How many penguins does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Penguins cannot screw in lightbulbs because they have wings instead of fingers or opposable thumbs, as humans do.

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whats the difference between a black man and a terd ? one is a black man the other is a terd

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What do you call a black man with pearl white teeth ? A man with good dental hygiene.

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Why are some people so awesome? Because their black.

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what happened when the chicken crossed the road? it got ran over by a car recently after it go killed it was eaten by a hobo and the hobo died from ring worm

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What Batman Said to Robin before getting into the car? I'll drive.

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What did the cancer patient get for his birthday HIV

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what did the doctor say to the guy with a bullet in his arm you have a bullet in your arm

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what do u call a 50 yr old man at disneyland a rapist

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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