A teacher, a consturction worker, and an army general are on an airplane. The pilot tells them the plane has too much weight, and if they don't each drop one item then the plane will crash. Realizing one item each is obviously not enough weight to throw off, the teacher and the construction worker team up and throw the army genral off the plane. They land safely, and live the rest of their life haunted by their vile actions.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's worse than a dog peeing on your new flower garden? A terrorist attack.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the black 10 year old miss school? Because his grandmother just had a severe heart attack and the whole family is coming in to visit and pay their last respects.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A doctor tells a woman he needs to take her rectal temperature. The woman tells the doctor "That's not my rectum." The doctor promptly apologizes and conducts the rest of the check up.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Knock knock? Who's There? I AMMM!!! (thumb this down please xD)

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A man killed himself.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you get when you cross a chicken and a dinosaur? You can't. Dinosaurs are extinct.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

God

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Whats Stupider than john? Nothing.. he's certifiably retarded

thumb_up thumb_down -13

So a man and a woman are siting at the same park table Woman: sir are you touching my leg erotically Man: No mam for you see I am a parapaligec

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why do vampires drink blood? Maybe if they existed you could ask one.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

uas;ugbasrG "khVESGF;OQWAEFH;OASEHFO;SAEFUASUusa;uefSOEHFSOEHDF;oasehf;oasehf;uoashvo;uasfo'H EF;owefhoaw;sefoasjefpiwaejf MINTY FRESGH

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's the difference between a sewer pipe and a French fry? A lot

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How did little Jimmy survive the 20 story fall? He couldn't he died from the last fall, aren't you paying attention?

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you call a blind person? Mack Despard

thumb_up thumb_down -13

LeBron in the fourth quarter

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Knock Knock! Come in the door is unlocked. I have cookies!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What made the old man laugh? A pile of dead babies.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

give a man a blow job and he'll come for a second. teach a man to blow job and .... no that just doesn't work

thumb_up thumb_down -13

three peanuts where walking down a dark alley, one was asalted

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What is the difference between 1000 dead babies and a Cadillac? I don't have a Cadillac in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Roses are red, Bacon is red, Poems are hard, Bacon

thumb_up thumb_down -13

-Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? -She had no arms. -Knock, knock. Who's there? -Not Sally.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did your mom make me for Christmas... ...An apple pie because she is a very nice lady

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops