What is green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

how do you decrease the unemployment figures? abolish lidle, aldi, and netto

yomamas so fat it made Ben kanobi say thats no moon thats yo mama!

Q: Were did the balls go? A: In the sack.

So a man walks into a bar… and gets a bad bruise and a big bump.

5 people are walking

What would you do for a Klondike bar? Nothing they are disgusting and pollute your body with fats that are not necessary for you to live. -CNN.com 11.78534629/10 scientists agree with this fact.

vaginas are pretty!!!!

A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender can you throw me a beer and the bartender says yes and he throws him the beer and the man says I can't catch I have the smallest hands in the world and the bartender says go across the street there is a guineas book of world record store an check if you h e the smallest hands and he does so the next day he goes back and asks for another beer and the bartender throws him a beer and say I cant catch cause I have the smallest feet in the world and he goes across the street and checks and he does and then the third day he goes back to the bar and asks for a beer and the bartendor throws him another beer and says I can't catch I have the smallest penis in the world so he goes to the guiness book o world record store and then goes bac to the bar and asks..... Who's austin bell?????

At the time my grandfather came round to visit, what was happening in Australia? A giant spider was giving birth.

what did little johnny scream at the xbox after he lost a game? god what the hell! Muskcrat143 i told u to cover my back when i had my predator missile! now my covers blown and i lost my killstreak! god u suck so much and Hippo099 why didn't u kill them before they got a killstreak like wtf!!! i told u to use ur semtex cause i had a claymore set down jeez u guys suck i'm leaving.

what do you call a joke that makes no sense? a joke that makes no sense

Knock knock Who's there? You're adopted.

Why Was Mary Short? She Had No Legs.

I went to the doctor & he gave only 6 months to live. I told him I couldn't pay my bill, he said "that doesn't change the fact you're going to die soon."

What's the difference between a poodle and a noodle? Scaboodle!

8

What did the white man do when he got a black eye? He thanked the gracious african-descented donor, and with a little luck he just might see his beautiful wife and kids again

TWO ROADS DIVERGED IN A WOOD

Why do people on here submit anti-jokes involving children getting raped or killed? Because the people on this website are sadists. =/

Why did the grandmother lock her grandson in the closet? Because she didn't love him.

How many ADD kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Let's ride bikes!

What's cool about a dead fish? Nothing.

Starting a Genocide #YOLO

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...