Why did susie fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms... Why didn't she get up? She didn't have any legs... Why didn't anyone help her? She didn't have any friends. Then she died

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Why does a chicken lay an egg? If she'd throw it it would break.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? An episode of 'Friends'.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Wait...what?

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What's worse than dying in the holocaust Dying on the last day of the holocaust

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What's the difference between a black man and a bench? A bench is an inanimate object.

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Why did the Asian drive his car into a tree? His contact fell out.

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Why is a charlie horse called a charlie horse? Well there was this boy charlie and he had a horse and it died in a fire.

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What did the teacher say to the student? You failed science

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why did sally fall off the swing? because she was a fish.

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Whats the difference between a sack of babies and a sandwich? A Sand which floats when you put it into a large body of water.

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THIS ONE IS MIIINE THIS ONE IS MIIINE I AM TOTALLY TIFA I AM TOTALLY TIFA! This one apparently.

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KNOK KNOK WHOES THERE APPLE APPLE WHO SEE THIS IS Y U BROKE UP

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What did Britney Spears say to the Mexican? Hit me baby Juan more time.

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Why couldnt the black guy swim? He couldn't swim because he had no parental figures growing up. His dad was part of a gang and his mom was a crack addict. He had noone to teach him how to swim.

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How many walls can you paint with a baby? Depends on how hard you throw it.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one.

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Q: what do you call a guy with no arms and no legs floating in the ocean? A: A very unfortunate individual.

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carn ehney bodie hellp mie with mine smellings?

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What do you call a big hungry duck? A duck thats hungry and big

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ass.

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An Indian lady is pushing her child down a footpath in a stroller whilst leading her dog. A refridgerator lands on the mother. Why did the Chinese man behind her cry? Because loss of life is a frantic event and having witnessed such an event he was deeply shocked. He was also sad that no dogs were killed. This is because a dog killed his wife in a freak accident and he has held a grudge against the species ever since.

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Chuck Norris doesn't do push-ups. He prefers to bench press.

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Why did suzie fall off the swing? Because She had no arms. Why did suzie fall off again? Becauze Jimmy was trying to snipe her in the head the first time

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops