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What did the little asian boy get for his birthday? To work for minimun wage making high quality shoes for greedy white people in North America who dont care about anybody but themselves.

What gets louder as it gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor.

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What's a fry cook's favorite day? Saturday. It's his day off.

How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just two, the mystery is how mice can get inside a lightbulb.

Wanna hear a joke? 9-11

Me: Want to hear a funny joke? Person: What? Me: Women's Right.

How do you get a clown off of a swing? Hit him with an ax.

Whats Brown And Sticky?! My Shit!

This is an anti-anti-joke.

What do you call a polar bear in the desert? Bobby Marksson.

Knock knock Who's there? To To who? No, Sir, it is "to whom"

What happen to the girl that received chocolate on Valentine's day? She had a allergic reaction.

How do you stay out of Heaven? you stay alive.

Why did little Billy not eat all his carrots? He does not care about his vision.

A priest, a monk, and a rabbi walk into a bar. They order drinks and keep the conversation to non-controversial topics.

Sigh... You know life, you start all optimistic and "I am going to be wealthy mommy and stuff" Then you know, life turns not quite out like you planned it, and, well, you wish you had made some other choices you know what I mean... Your grades where not that good, that girl you really loved did not like you back, you know what I mean right? ...Well I don't, how is it like?

Roses are red violets are blue suck my **** and I'll **** you too

Why was Hellen Keller afraid to answer the phone? This situation is impossible because Hellen suffered from scarlet fever, therefore she could not see or hear the phone.

What's cool about a dead fish? Nothing.

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

Why can't Susie jump rope? Because she has no arms. Knock knock! who's there? Not Susie.

Dr. I need a new butt, mine has a crack in it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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