Why was Billy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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What did Osama Bin Laden say before was captured? nothing the U.S. military slit his throat on site

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Nicki Minaj walks into a bar... there's no punchline because ruining music isn't funny.

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Did you hear about the 4'10" psychic that escaped from prison? It's on the news! "Small Medium At Large."

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I used to tell people: step on my foot on purpose and ill FUCKlNG BREAK YOURS! Then I Evolved.. friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man: Thumb me down or step on my foot if only on mistake, and I will break off both your legs and ram them up your ASS!

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What did the explorer say to the new species Oh look it says squirtle let's call it squirtle Oh look it say woof let's call it poochyena

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I remember my grandfather's last words he said to me before he kicked the bucket...."Hey, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?"

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because, the farmer lacked basic fence mending skills.

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Sometimes I stare at a Frisbee and wonder why it is getting bigger. Then, it hits me.

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A jewish man runs into a wall with an erection. He broke his nose.

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Women's Rights.

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Q: What is the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? A: I don't have a Porsche in my garage.

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What is intangible and has every color on the rainbow? A rainbow.

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How did Barry Bonds break the career homerun record? A combination of natural ability, practice, and a plethora of performance enhancing drugs.

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What did the person with down syndrome do? He mumbled for a while, chewed on his thumb, fell flat on his face, and died.

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An old man walks into a bar. He drinks 3 beers and dies. The bartender calls paramedics but when the police came they arrested the bartender for beating his wife. A few hours later an earthquake destroys the bar and everyone was evacuated and many were injured. The manager was driving to the scene but has a car accident with the ambulance. It was such a bad day.

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Knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? I don't have a last name.

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A boy bought a dozen roses, eleven real, one fake. He looks deeply into his girlfriends eyes, hers looking back, brimming with love and affection as he says, "I slept with your sister."

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A catholic priest gets a nun pregnant. He drowns the baby several months later.

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Two twins are born only a minute apart. There is a mistake at the hospital and they are seperated. Years later they reconnect on Oprah and realize they do not have much in common.

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How do you please a black person? Shower him with love and affection.

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a horse nibbled a baby

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Roses are black, Violets are black, I am blind.

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what do Jewish people and pizzas have in common? they enjoy parties

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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