What do you call a man with no arms or legs? His name.

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A bishop died and went to heaven. At the Pearly gates he sees Saint Peter , so he says to Peter "All my life I've been a committed Christian, but I just before I died I was tempted by a woman of ill repute". Saint Peter says "This is just an illusion, your dying brain is merely conjuring up images based on your presuppositions of an 'afterlife'. You have about three seconds left"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why do you care what a chicken thinks?

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Why do leprechauns laugh when they run through the grass? Because it tickles their nuts.

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how do you get a girl of a swing? puch her off! how do you get her friend of a swing? throw a refridgerator at her!

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Knock Knock Who's there? Not Anne Frank

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Q: What did the duck say to the bartender? A: Nothing considering that ducks cannot speak

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What did the children say when the magician pulled a rabbit out of his hat? Nothing, but the parents called Animal Control, and the magician was imprisoned after a dog-fighting ring was discovered in Michael Vick's estate.

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Why is the boy home alone on Friday night? Because HItler took he's parents away.

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What did one gothic person say to another gothic person? Nothing. Gothic people only cut themselves.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Holy crap, the garden's on fire.

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Your mama is so ugly, when she looks in the mirror it displays her reflection like all mirrors do

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Why is a blonde girl crying in the bathroom? Because she has been bullied and someone broke her nose.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Interupting cow Interu--- MOOOOOO!!

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more like nig!

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a chinese wompus came out of the basement.

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Ahhh! Grandpa your going too hard!

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"My c.ock is bigger!" "No! My c.ock is bigger!": Two gamec.ock owners arguing over who has a bigger dick.

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YO MAMMA IS SO STUPID, she was recently diagnosed with severe mental retardation and will have to be cared for 24/7

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You really need some help in spelling the word GOD... Anyway, none of your fucking business.I am a child for this scenario only so... Moral: LET THAT CHILD ALONE!

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Why was the guy shot? He was a soldier in World War 2. Lots of people were shot.

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What do you call a unicorn that is both invisible and pink? The Invisible Pink Unicorn.

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I'm Donald Trump! Wump wump wump! Win a few Lose a few I'm Donald Trump!

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LAST COMMENT? DISGUSTIIIING! NO YOU TAKE IT!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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