Hi I'm makena. I'm a cynical asshole

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Why did the woman spend all her time in the kitchen? For fear of her abusive husband.

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What was the first thing that went through the mind of the first 9/11 jumper? Thank god I only jumped from the first floor.

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Why did the circus clown lose his balance? He had a seizure while on his unicycle, fell off, and bumped his head, leading to significant blunt trauma in the brain. Weeks later, after waking up from a coma, the doctors discover that he can no longer speak anything other than gibberish. His friends and family decide that he cannot go on living this way and decide to pull the plug.

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YOUR MUM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Whats green and has wheels?? - Grass, I lied about the wheels

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Roses are red Violets are blue Roses are red Violets are blue whilst you reading this I just raped you

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What do you call the worst band ever? Nickelback.

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What did the redneck say about his missing tractor? Where's my tators.

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What made people stop likeing Ice tea? Ice-T

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why did the elephant cross the road? it was the chickens day off.

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Q:How do you confuse a blonde preschooler? A:Calculus.

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Do you know what african children do? They die of starvation.

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Hitler: honey what's for dinner? Hitlers wife: a jewwwsyy steak

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Q: What's brown and looks like a weasel? A: A weasel.

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Knock Knock Who's There Your doctor... You have Aids

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goats are like mushrooms, if you shoot a duck, im scared of toasters

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How do you get 4 Jews in a car? Open the door and tell them politely to get in.

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How can you outsmart Stephen Hawking? Steal the wheels of his chair and replace them with a dolphin.

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what does a squid and a worm have in commen they both are animals

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What happens when you walk around with a kick me sign on your back? you get punched in the face. How are you supposed to know it says kick, you cant see your own back.

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I hate it when people pour my cereal. They don't know how much I want. They don't know my life. They don't know what I've been through.

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hello? knock knock. you called me, why are you saying knock knock?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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