Why was Johnny sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

Q. Name six animals that live in the north pole A.Four polar-bears and two penguins

What did one ocean say to the other? Nothing they just waved

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because the monkey has a very weak cerrebellum.

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What did one pare say to the other ... ... WE MAKE A GREAT PARE!!!

knock knock. who's there? your neighbor. o hi come one in!

What did the black man get his mom for Mother's Day? Some jewelry and a very nice card.

knock knock? who's there? ted? ted who? stop f***ing around, you got cancer.

Why did the man shoot himself? Because he already shot his wife.

In Soviet Russia, this type of joke would be considered evidence to throw you into the gulag.

What's got eight legs and one eye? Two chairs and half a pigs head.

What do you get when you cross Winter Squash, Beets, Ham, Coffee, Spinach, Hexamine, Cadmium, Detergent, and some love? A bowl full of crap.

Whats the difference between black and white. Nothing they're both colors.

Why didn't the boy eat his food? because he wasn't hungry.

Why didn't Superman save anyone on September 11? He was in a wheelchair.

Who did the man call when his house was on fire? He called his mother as the firefighters put out the fire.

A man walks outside and walks back in. Why? Because it was raining purple unicorns and he felt the need to go back inside.

A blonde went to a doctor for a checkup. The blonde couldn't hear the doctor 'cuz she had headphones on so the doctor took them off. A couple of minutes later she died. The doctor was curious so he put the headphones on. It was saying, "Breathe in, breathe out. Breathe in, breathe out..."

what's worse than fining out that the best and worst jokes on anti-joke.com are about the Holocaust The Holocaust

A dyslexic man walks into a saloon and asks for a hair cut.

So this beautiful woman goes to see her doctor and says "Doctor i think i have a fever." the doctor replies "I think I've got just what you need. open your mouth." The woman opened her mouth and the doctor gave her some Advil "This should help your fever. that will be $300." in shock the woman said "these prices are to high."

Roses are red Jeffrey's a nigger A refrigerator is white But Jeffrey's not a refrigerator. He's a nigger.

What color was the fence before it was painted green? Not green.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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