Friend: What do you call a farting dog? Me: A canine releasing built up pressure as a result of excess carbon-based gases produced by the synthesizing and decompositional digestive reactions in the stomach and intestines. Friend: ... Who is a nerd, pointless, has no social life, and cant take a joke? Me: No one. No one but you is that exceptionally lacking in character.

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Dont read this joke

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were you expecting a joke

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Q: What do you do when you see a half dead black guy on your front lawn? A: Call the ambulance because he is dying

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Hum... I am actually a redhead... Which is so strange saying to anyone including myself, I dye it like constantly.

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? One is a human profession, and the other is a type of fish.

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i want to meet Dora's parents and ask them why they let that bitch go everywhere

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Q: On a plane, a black man does not grab a bag of peanuts, while everyone else does. Why? A: He has allergies.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't because he's CHICKEN.

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what has 2 eyes but can't see... an asian

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One man says to another "Hey you have banana in your ears." The other man replies "I can't hear you, I have bananas in my ears."

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What do you call a group of jews hiding in an attic? Well, this sounds very similar to the events during World War II in which Anne Frank and various jewish refugees hid from the Nazis.

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Q: Why did the lady retire? A: Because she had been working for numerous years and felt that she needed to spend more time with her family.

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Why cant steve get a job? Because Steve Jobs is DEAD! Moral: And people are all like "you gotta respect the dead", uh... Why not respect people while they are alive? Humanity is so fucking "smart" sometimes ya? Not that your answer matters...

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i have a christmas tree.

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Knock knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant.

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Q: Why was the blonde disappointed with her trip to England? A: She found out Big Ben was only a clock

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If life gives you lemons your hallucinating

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Whats as flat as a pancake and alive Ya nan being flattened by a truck on the motorway

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ADAM SAS IS A GREAT GUY!

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What do you do if your computer breaks: Go on your phone. What do you do if your phone breaks: Go on you iPod What do you do if your iPod breaks: Then your screwed and you should get a Job and learn not to break things.

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Why was the little boy upset? He was on fire.

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Knock Knock. -Who's there ? It's me. -Come in.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No Neither has he

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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