What happens if you play CS:GO? Well you loose alot of fucking money.

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What do 2 arabs say to each other in a super-market? For those of you who don't know your history, the true Lebanese are Phonecians. As such, they are not Ishmaelites/Arabs. They are from the house of Jaffeth. the youngest of Noah's sons. Arabs are from the house of Shem (i.e., Shemites/Semites), the oldest of Noah's sons, and Hamm, Noah's middle son who fathered Cannah with his mother. Haggar, the woman with whom Abraham fathered Ishmael, was a Cannonite. As such, Ishmael, the father of the Arabs, is half Semetic and half Hammetic. The true Lebanese are neither. Furthermore, the first non-Jewish Christian church was established with the Gentiles (the children of Jaffeth) in Lebanon. And then the shop blew up.

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A man is shipwrecked on a desert island. One day, he finds an old lamp. When he rubs it, a genie appears. The genie says, "You have freed me. As a reward, I will grant you three wishes." The man smacks himself in the face and mutters, "Oh god, I'm seeing genies now. I must be delirious from lack of food and water." Several hours later, he dies.

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? Names.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a WAFFLE!

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Why are roses red ? Ass in my face .

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An Indian child is born with three arms. After being ridiculed his whole life he kills himself at age 19.

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how many black guys goes it take to screw inalightbulb? just one, but inalightbulb was feeling rather slutty today, so 2.

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Chuck Norris' balls were so big that he went to the doctor to get them checked on and it was discovered that he had testicular cancer.

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Did you hear about the guy who lost the left side of his body in an accident? He bled to death.

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What did the black man say to his wife? Nothing, she had died earlier that year after a long battle with cancer.

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what do you call a cat with no tail? smithers.

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Knock Knock! EXPLOSION!!!!

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is dead.

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Did you hear about Osama Bin Laden? Well, he's dead.

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cats, swimming, northpole ,sky, park , tree , bench, anti joke. shut up you have a skin disease!

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What's the difference between 10 dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage..

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Why does the groom wear a black tux? Because he knows a funeral when he sees one.

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I'd like to make this joke funnier but I can't. It's stupid. I don't even like it.

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A black man walks into a store with a gun. He is a policeman bringing in a murder weapon as part of his investigation.

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womens rights.

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Dr. Dick Howard Long visits a friend in England. Arriving at his friend's house, he knocked at the door. A butler then lets him in and asks, "Sir, would you like to wait while the Master bathes?" The doctor then replies, "Sure thing, I'll wait until he's done."

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Your mom is so fat when she sat on wallmart she lowered the prices

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What is green and had wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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