A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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What do you call a dumb blonde with no hair? You don't, since there is no way of knowing that she is blonde.

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Roses are red Violets are blue You think this will rhyme But it's not gonna

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What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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So a blond is rowing a boat in the middle of the field. It turns out she was insane and was trying to escape from the sanitarium.

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Knock knock Whos there Bill O hey bill

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Why did the Koala fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second Koala fall out of the tree? He got hit by the first one. Why did the third Koala fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game and wanted to play along.

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whats worse than finding half a worm in your apple? being wrongly accussed of a crime you didnt commit because of your race, and being put on death row

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Hi I'm makena. I'm a cynical asshole

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Knock Knock Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? To get to the other side!

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Steve Jobs Died today. So did 56 million other people.

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There's a Korean Black person and a Mexican on a cliff who jumps first? Who Cares

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What's the difference between a plum and bunny? They're both purple, except the bunny.

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what do black and white people have in common? when they dont wear sunscreen, they get sunburnt, except for black people.

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Why did the blonde walk into the men's restroom? Because the blonde was a man who needed to expel his feculent waste.

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Rose are red, violets are blue, niggas is soft, just like you

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Yolo is for losers, I have 9 lives...meow

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Democracy.

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How do you milk a cow? Pull on its' utters.

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why did the chicken cross the road? who cares i dying from cancer

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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Whats green and has wheels?? - Grass, I lied about the wheels

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What did the redneck say about his missing tractor? Where's my tators.

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What made people stop likeing Ice tea? Ice-T

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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