Q. Where do you find Indonesia A. On a map

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What did the girl with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bike!

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how do you know when your in love? massive erection.

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Why did the crack addict see colors. He was looking at the northern lights

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I once duped this chick with a parrot. Crazy thing wouldn't shut up. The parrot was pretty cool

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i have a christmas tree.

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Knock knock. Who’s there? Your son. Your son who? DAD WHY CAN’T YOU ACCEPT THE FACT THAT I AM GAY!

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What's the capital of Ohio? O

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What did the suicide bomber say on new years day? Happy new year.

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Some people are like Slinkies: they don't work as well as they say they will and you'll get bored of them quickly.

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what does a gay horse eat heeyyyyy

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Evolution is real. Why? Pikachu evolves.

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whats the difference between a door knob? a milk carton, because people have legs so they can walk !!!!!

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like most people my age. im 27

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What kinds of children go to heaven dead ones

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One day a cheerio is walking down the street. Nothing special, just a regular cheerio. Suddenly, he sees a honey-coated cheerio. Now, honey-coated cheerios have a much higher social status than regular cheerios. So he decides that he wants to become a honey- coated cheerio. He works really, really hard and one day his boss promotes him to a honey-coated cheerio. So, he's really pleased about this, he can easily pay his rent, he gets a nice car, and his family is much happier. But then, as he's driving around the town, he sees a sugar-coated cheerio. Now, sugar-coated cheerios are preety much at the top of society. They're all highly regarded and respected. So he decides that he wants to become a sugar-coated cheerio. He works really, really hard for months and months, until one day his boss decides that he can become a sugar-coated cheerio. He is absolutely stoked with this. He gets a bigger house with a swimming pool and a spa, really nice clothes, and he's very well respected. One day, he's sun bathing at the beach, when off in the distance he sees an island that he had never seen before. Apparently, this is the golden cheerio island. Cheerios there fly around in jet cars and lounge around in bars. It's cheerio heaven. So he decides that if he becomes a golden cheerio, his life will be complete. He dedicates his life to working really, incredibly hard, and one day his boss says to him, "You know what, you've worked so hard that I'm promoting you to a golden cheerio." So he makes it to the cheerio island, and as he is lying down, relaxing, he suddenly becomes very thirsty. All cheerios really like milk so he goes to get some, but there's a really long line at the milk stand. So he decides to get some lemonade, but like the milk stand, there's a really long line at the lemonade stand. So he thinks, "I know what no-one will want. Punch!" So he goes to the punch stand and sure enough there's no punch line.

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Patient: Doctor, I was cleaning my glass eye and accidentally swallowed it. Doctor: OK. Lean over and spread your legs. Patient: (Leans over and spreads his legs). Doctor: My God! This is the first time, in all my years of practice, that I've ever seen an asshole looking back at me

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Knock Knock! Who’s there? Alligator! I'm positively sure that Alligators are unable to talk, now please tell me who this is before I call the police.

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Once upon a time there was a small poor boy in a small German village. Her was name Smalls. Later he found out that he had to go back to Virginia because of their family then she got milk and went to the play that night like he was planning, and it was probably a problem with the clutch or transmission. It was fine because Smalls was 64 years old.

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What do you get when you have 10 kids in a church? A lot of rape cases.

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I am white, you are black, we can be friends, racism was abolished.

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What is the difference between a circle and a cylinder? dunno

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Brad Fuller!

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You know what makes me smile? Face muscles.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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