A kangaroo walks into a bar and says "Lipstick is the blood of all wounds." The bartender does not know how the kangaroo said this or why.

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What happened when the prisoner dropped the soap? He picked it up.

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Person 1: Why do Jews have big noses? Person 2: Why? Person 1: No, I was asking you that question. Person 2: ??!!

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar.

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? Bees inside of your eyeballs.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I need a job Stop spitting on me

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roses are red. vilets are blue. I'm getting hungry. make me some food...bitch.

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If life throws you lemons, you might be dislexic

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im gunna build a lego house what shud i make it out of

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What's the difference between a bench and a black man? The bench is an inanimate object incapable of thought

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Winter

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What happened to the guy that got hit by a bus. He died

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, What else is new?

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elen degeneres is straight....

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What do you call an old widow with 12 cats? Forever alone.

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TELL

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A chemist and his buddy walk into a bar. The chemist, trying to sound smart, says, "I would like a glass of H20." The buddy, being a normal person who actually cares if he looks like an idiot, asks for plain water.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

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-Hey I know something funnier than 24, ---What? -25! Hey I know something funnier than 25. ---What? -The Holocaust!

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what do you call a nun in a wheel chair? Virgin Mobile By: jb lshs

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yo mommas so ugly that as a child she was often teased for her looks.

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An Indian lady is pushing her child down a footpath in a stroller whilst leading her dog. A refridgerator lands on the mother. Why did the Chinese man behind her cry? Because loss of life is a frantic event and having witnessed such an event he was deeply shocked. He was also sad that no dogs were killed. This is because a dog killed his wife in a freak accident and he has held a grudge against the species ever since.

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Why was Abraham Lincolin President. He was elected by the people of the united states.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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