What's the difference between a Green Grocers and Fighter pilot! One flys a plane and one sells food.

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a seal walks into a club.

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Q: Have you heard from that guy who dropped a piano on his head? A: No one has, he dropped a piano on his head.

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What did the black person use to peel a banana? His hands.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimer Roses are red

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Hitler wasn't that bad... He DID kill Hitler.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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How did a baby get across the street? Stapled to a chicken.

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what do you call a gay guy in a sleeping bag? a fruit roll-up. GET IT? because gay guys like fruit roll-ups.

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What did one say to the other woman? I have a penis

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What do you call a puppy with one eye, one ear, and one leg? An ugly mother f*cker.

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Two guys are on a bridge. One commits suicide, the other one is called John.

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How do you stop a clown from smiling? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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YOLO

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The easter bunny should be a platypus. Bunnies do not lay eggs. Platypuses do, however, and are the only mammals that lay eggs.

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You know what rhymes with school? Hell.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Not because she had no arms, but because she just had no hands.

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How do you get to pigs in a pen? Move them.

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What's worse than losing your wallet? Having a miscarriage.

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A man goes and buys a head of cabbage. The cabbage had a worm in it. When the man saw the worm, he threw out the cabbage and bought a new one the next time he went to the grocery store.

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What do you call Helena… A Shady palm tree

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Two guys walk into a bar.

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Q:Why do black people wear fitted caps? A: So pigeons don't shit on their lips.

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What would happen if an asian guy and a black guy had a baby? Nothing. It is impossible for a baby to be born since men produce sperm cells not egg cells and for a fetus to form, you need an egg and a sperm, so you would need a male and a female so since they are both men it is physically impossible for them to produce a child.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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