why couldnt the boy get into the pirate movie? he was hit by a mexican telephone server.

What did the Black construction worker say to the Asian salesman? I want some milk.

Q. What was the the cancer's patients favorite song? A. Radioactive

1-1 was a race horse, 1-2 was one too, 1-1 won one once and 1-2 won one too

How do you take a Mexican's money? You can't because they have none.

What would be the worst thing to do to Helen Keller? Cut her hands off, as it would destroy her last chance at communication and re-arranging her house so she often fell nub first over chairs.

what did bob say tothe ugly duckling? your ugly and a duckling

Jews

where did suzie go when the bomb hit her?? Everywhere

I was reading a book about antigravity, but I put it down because it was boring.

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? There aren't pineapples in the ocean.

What do you do if you see a man on the street with a pineapple up his bum? Take him to the hospital to have the pineapple removed professionally. It could be potentially dangerous for his health.

A: what does hellen keller say to her mom? B: nothing. she cant speak due to her lack of hearing and visualizing

It's Christmas Eve and your entire family is gone for 12 hours to by you presents. What will you do while there gone? By the time you figured out what you will do you will hear a knock at your door. It's the police they are here to tell you your entire family was murdered during a shooting at the mall. The sad part is you will not receive your NEW Beats, your Xbox 1, or your make up.

Because she has down's syndrome

A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervour father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happyness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

a little boy takes his lacrosse stick to his mom and says "hey mom this is bob" the mom says "hi bob" and she says to her son "does bob say hi back?" and the boy says "no mom. hes a lacrosse stick."

What do you have Canasta!!! Were not playing canasta you stupid asshole

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

Why did the man walk into the grocery store? To provide an alibi for his identical twin who was committing 1st degree murder at the time.

Q: Why did the cheerleader drop her pom-poms? A: She was knocked unconscious from behind and repeatedly sodomized by a convicted rapist.

What's the difference between Micheal Jackson and a grocery bag? One carries groceries and the other molests children

A girl walks into a strip club, she was tired of her husband and wanted to see how it was actually done.

What did the sheep say when he broke a leg? Nothing, sheeps can't talk.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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