- Anti Joke

Two blondes and a brunnett walk into a bar. Remarkably, there was nothing else notable about any of them.

What's worse than getting rejected by your date? Finding out she gave you a social disease. Namely AIDS.

Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? A: Taking the laws of physics into consideration, nobody could fit inside a pineapple, nor could a pineapple survive in the sea

theres this guy that i REALLY like but today he was putting something in my locker, it was gumbie the little green bendy thing but i didnt want it to be in my locker so i slammed my locker, except the only thing was that his pinky was in the way!!!! oh gosh i felt soooooo bad!!!! turns out he went to the hostpital and got stitches!!!!!!! that made it worse on me!!!!!! he said he was finee but i still cant let that go!!!!!

roses are red leather is black when when god made you he was smoking crack

So a mouse walks into a bar....the bartender immediatly kills it because he doesn't want another C rating by the sanitation department.

A father of four joins the military. He returns home after his service.

What's the difference bettween the holocaust and a bee, 6 million jews died during the holocaust. Bees make honey.

Little kid asks his mom: "Why do zombies eat people?" His mom says: "Becasue honey, your MEAT"

During english, we started talking about Attention Deficit Disorder when... OOOOOOOOOHHHHHH SHINY... wait what were we talking about

What did casino dealer say to the other? Every day I'm shuffling.

Add William Wright On Facebook Answer- www.facebook.com/public/William-Wright

All this fuss about drink driving is a load of crap! I frequently drink and drive, and I've never had an accident, apart from one small collision in which my wife was paralysed from the neck down.

why did the plant eat a banana? it was hungry

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A man walks into a bar. The barman says, 'why the lo-, wait, i thought you was that horse again.'

Yeah I was beginning to enjoy that as well, but I used "timed hypnosis" I have not seen it been coined elsewhere yet, not that I learn hypnosis anymore, I kinda teach it covertly to whoever I believe can use it responsively. "Timed hypnosis" is not really based upon a set amount of time after all time is relative, and our subconcious does know that and the subconcius understands that we did not invent time just because we made some fucking dials spin around" Now, timed hypnosis is based on a purpose, for example: "I will go into a trance until I am done teaching my new buddy how covert hypnosis works and teach her to use it subconciously" But now I made you aware of that, so you can use it consciously as well, the real magic here is that the subconcious is so much more efficient and powerful than the conscious mind that it would not even be neccesary to have a concious mind, except for one thing.

How many turrets patients does it take to screw in a light bulb? Cocksucker!!

Extra extra read all about it dunkin donuts has now been named dunkin pigs..a cops favorite hang out.

What's funny? A joke. What's funnier than a joke? Two jokes.

- Knock knock - Who's there - James - James who ? - James Redwood.

Knock knock Who's there A girl scout A girl scout who? A girl scout trying to sell cookies to support her alcoholic parents who beat her

A blonde, brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The redhead, growing tired of the constant ridicule directed at her from the other two solely on her hair color, proceeds to kill them with a single shot glass. She pleads guilty to 3rd degree murder on two counts and is sentenced two life sentences in a maximum security prison in Cambodia.

What do you have when you take the gun, badge and uniform away from a cop? A man in his underwear.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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