The philosophy professor decided to isolate himself in his closet until he figured out the meaning of life. After ten years, he had done it. He came out of isolation and immediately found one of his former colleagues on campus. He said, "I've discovered the meaning of life!" The colleague said, "Ok, what is it?" The professor said, "Life is like a bridge." The colleague said, "How so?" After a few moments, the professor nodded and said, "Yea, I guess you're right."

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why did the Mexican take $20, because he found it on the ground

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A biology teacher walks into a bar. "Ouch," he says. "I bet I just lost some brain cells. I wonder if any of them were going through mitosis..."

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What did the man with a cold say when a jew walked into a bar? Hahaha you walked into a bar. What did the man with a cold say when a jew walked into a pub? AHH-JOOOOO!!!

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How do you get a clown to stop laughing? Throw an axe at it's face.

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Why did the guy get hit by a bus? He walked out into traffic.

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Why did the blonde switch the lamp on? Because it was getting dark

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What would Walt Disney be if he were still alive today? Still anti-semetic

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why did Jen fall off the swing? because she had no arms. knock knock who's there not Jen

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How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? 124

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Nathaniel Nugnes walks into a bra

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What do an elephant and a grape have in common? They're both purple... except for the elephant.

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"My c.ock is bigger!" "No! My c.ock is bigger!": Two gamec.ock owners arguing over who has a bigger dick.

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You know what they say about priests with big rosaries? I don't know, it's in Latin.

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Haikus are good poems, They don't always make sense though, I saw a squirrel.

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Why did the man get frustrated searching through a box of forks? He was looking for a spoon.

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Yo mama so fat when she looked at the scale it said to be continued

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A gay man walks into a biker bar and orders a drink. The bartender says "Hey, you want ice with that?"

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What do you call a dog with no arms and no legs. It doesn't matter what you call him he still won't come.

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What did one Lacrosse player say to the other? Let's touch shafts

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why was smokey bear sad? he got cancer from smokeing

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What did the blind kid say to his dad Nothing , his dads dead

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Roses are red, violets are red, tulips are red, oh shit my gardens on fire!!!

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What starts with F and ends with uck? Fire truck

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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