Oh because you have Lou Gehrigs Disease

Is this the Krusty Krab? No, This is Patrick.

Do you know who's gay? Homosexuals.

A rabbit crosses a road... To be continued

What do you call a kid with cancer? screwed

What is the difference between a mexican and a bench? One is living, one is not.

a preist sees a rabbi on the street while taking a walk. he says hi and proceeds to have a nice conversation as they are good friends despite their religous differences

how do you burn a lot of calories? set a fat kid on fire

What is big, grey and can't climb trees? A car park.

If you were in a room with Osama bin Laden, Hitler, and a black guy and you had two bullets, who would you shoot? Personally, I'm a peaceful person. I'd let Hitler figure it out.

What do you call a dragon with no wings? A komodo dragon

What did Christopher Columbus say to his men before they got on the ship? Get on the ship.

An African-American man calls KFC. An employee answers. "Thank you for calling KFC." The man replies, "I'm sorry, I must have dialed the wrong number."

An old jew, an irish man, and a young mexican woman in her mid 20's are on an island. They eventually become hungry to a extremely ravishing extent. The jew cries out: "I can't take the thought of consuming man, because I am only allowed to consume kosher" The Mexican says: "Alright" The Irishman says: "O.K. Until then lets head over to Timilio's... I hear they are a fine establishment and also serve Kosher meals."

What do you call a cow after an earthquake? Dead. The barn collapsed on top of it.

What did the cow say to the Businessman? Nothing. Cows cant talk.

Why did the man walk into the grocery store? To provide an alibi for his identical twin who was committing 1st degree murder at the time.

what did the clock say to the other clock? .. were both lawyers!

a man walks into a bar the bar tender says why the long face? i just walked into a bar

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

There once was a man who couldn't finish any sente

Roeses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, My Name Is Dave, Microwave

What do 10 dead babies in a blender sound like? Idk because I was too busy masturbating.

What happens when a scientist tells you a lie? It's not true.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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