what does a baby with no lims get for christmas...cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -24

One day, a mother was speaking with her daughters. "Mommy," the first one said, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we brought you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second daughter said, "Why did you name me Rose?" ""Because when we brought you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMBWWAAAAGGGH!" the last daughter cried. She was born with severe special needs and is incapable of coherent speech.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

roses are red violets are blue i am bipolar so am i

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I have five fingers, When will you put the ring on the one NEXT to the middle one? Never?! F you.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

How did the girl fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

three retards, a Jew, 4 Mexicans, and an Eskimo go to the grocery store. Windex is on sale. The Jew bought artichokes.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What's red, blue & green all over?

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What did the paper say to the pen? Nothing, they are inanimate objects!

thumb_up thumb_down -26

The big male boar went out the forest, saw a group of women and start to swank.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

I hated the Reading festival, i'm dyslexic. I hated it because my family died in a housefire while I was there.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

An Icelandic boy hangs himself because of peer pressure. His family mourns for their loss

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Which hockey player has scored the monst goals of all time? He-Shoot-Si Scores

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Q: What Would Canada Be With out Nature A: Peru

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Whats long and black? The unemployment line

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Touche.try eating something, I eat low carb crap when I am too sleepy, and today I guess it works.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

the more I study the more I know, the more I know the more I forget, the more I forget the less I know, why study?

thumb_up thumb_down -28

the horse walks into the bar the bartender calls the pet control

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Why the he'll are there moths in the universe? It makes no sense. Where dies an annoying ass buzzing and flying price if isht ever help me?

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Why did the housewife become a farmer? Because the kitchen was burned down in a horrific accident.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

There's a black guy and a white guy standing in a bar, surprisingly the black guy doesn't die. This isn't a racist joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

what's worse than finding mommy kissing santa clause ? slave trading

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Why couldn't the kitten drink its milk? Because his face was stapled to the wall.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Whats the difference between Justin Bieber and Lady Gaga? one of them is a women the other one is not.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What's better than singing in the rain? Singing in a Pitt of fire. Oh wait that would be way worse than singing in the rain

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops