A pig, a chicken, and a cow are born on 3 separate barns. They are raised by old men who subside off the grains of the field. When the animals mature, the farmers will butcher the pig, slaughter the chicken, and gut the cow. The farmer who raised the chicken may enjoy a few eggs first but the animals will all die eventually. Either of natural causes or more likely being butchered for profit. Cows make milk.

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1,2,3,4,5... 6.

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what do a parrot and a hippo have in common? i want to kill every non white human being!!!!

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An orphan walks into a bar. The bartender calls Child Protective Services and is given to a nice foster family.

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What do you call a guy with no arms and legs sitting on your street corner? Suicidal.

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Q: What happens when you hit a man with a car? A: You speed away hoping no one saw, you spend the next month and a half agonizing over your crime as it consumes you because you think of the poor man's family, then you either go to prison or hang yourself from a fan all because you wanted road dome....

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What is orange, has 7 legs, and makes the same noise as a crow? If you can think of something that fits all of those characteristics, you need help

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Hickory Dickory Dock My dog died today.

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why did the little girl eat grapes? because she felt like it.

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A man finds a mysterious lamp on the side of the road. He picks it up, rubs it, and sells the lamp at a pawn shop for $10,000. The man paid off his credit card debt and was happy that he did not have to file for bankruptcy.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

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I was going to post some witty jokes, but then I realized they weren't funny.

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Why did the banana explode? Because it was a grenade!

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once upon a time, it snowed

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What is 6 1/2 inches when erected? My penis.

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Roses are red Violets are blue One fish two fish Red fish blue fish

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A cat walks into a Chinese restaurant. It is then asked to leave.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms! Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sarah!

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So a moose, a deer, and a horse walk into a bar. One of the people at the bar was a hunter who was carrying his gun. Several people got up and left after they realized the potential danger of the situation.

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How many Aumish farmhands does it take to operate a state of the art commercial laser-cutter? One,provided he has the relevant training and experience.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, the answer is to get to the other side, but this is an anti-joke site so I don't know why as it can't be it.

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A black guy, a Mexican, an Arab and a white guy walk into a room and embrace cultural diversity.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate you, Die.

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whyd the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side :)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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