There are two fish in a tank. They both die, tanks are used for warfare.

What's the difference between a chicken and a bartender? A chicken is a domesticated fowl, a subspecies of the red junglefowl. As one of the most common and widespread domestic animals, with a population of more than 24 billion in 2003, there are more chickens in the world than any other species of bird. Humans keep chickens primarily as a source of food, consuming both their meat and their eggs. A bartender is a person who mixes and serves alcoholic drinks at a bar. also bar-tender ; 1836, American English,

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? BECAUSE HE WAS DEAD.

How do you call a cat for it's dinner? Come here cat!

What's worse than carrying a heavy suitcase? Poisoning children.

Whats worse than a fart joke? A queef joke.

Knock Knock Who's there? Gestapos.

Why dont jews eat pork? Because the torah doesnt allow cannibalism

why did the woman walk into the kitchen? i don't know, but the better question is why she left in the first place.

What's the difference between a plum and an elephant? They're both purple but the elephant is gray.

roses are red violets are blue your mum is a whore as are you:)

Why was 6 afraid of seven? seven commited statitory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8, murdered nine, was sent to jail for life, let out early for community service, and told 6 he was coming forhim 6 months later.... 6 commited suicide by jumping off a cliff his body was never found his family didnt get to say good bye thats why 6 is afraid of 7

A black man,a Hispanic man, and a white man are in a race. The white man wins because he took steroids and used somebody else's urine for the drug test.

What color was the fence before it was painted green? Not green.

A man decided to commit suicide. He did.

What do you call an apple in a washing machine? My lunch!

Neutron walks into a bar and orders a drink. It never receives it because it can't talk and is far too small to see.

Yo momma's so fat that she's gotta get a special door that will allow her to get through.

If there are anti jokes why are there no uncle jokes?

What do you call two dog? dogs

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse doesn't reply because horses don't speak. However, he is confused and scared by the unfamiliar surroundings. Trying to escape, the horse breaks his leg. The horse must be put down.

What's the difference between a truckload of bowling balls and a truckload of dead babies? You can't unload a truckload of bowling balls with a pitchfork.

What's the best rabbit for a black person?

What's wrong with Barney? He's big and purple.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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