Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog Woof.

What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

Two children are opening presents for Christmas. Daughter: "Look how many beautiful things I've got, look how much parents love me! And you got a Jo-Jo! Ha-ha!" Son*playing with Jo-Jo*: "Yeah, some of us have Jo-Jo, and some of us leuchemia. Ha-ha."

What has two legs and is red all over? Half a cat

Why does Santa Clause eat cookies? Because cookies not part of a balanced diet.

Two People go To Africa They have a lovely time they come home then go to Miami Florida after Florida they decide to go to germany sadly there was a plane crash and the two men fell into a pit of acid.

Ask me if im an Airplane. Are your Airplane? Hell yes

Why did the police arrest the Escalade full of black men? Reckless driving. I lied, it was an asian woman.

What did the chickens say to the other chicken Go away mother clucker

Whats the difference between babies and a dart board? Dart boards dont bleed

ive got nothing funny to say, so this is what its like to be a woman

How do you protect yourself from fire? Kill an orphan and nail its bones to your skin.

What did the angry asian man do after he crashed his car? He died of serious head trauma and internal bleeding.

Roses are blue, Violets are red, Wait, what? huh

What is the difference between a black man and a pizza? A pizza can feed a family

Why did the little girl drop her school books? A kid jacked her in the head with a brick.

What's sad about an elderly couple who has had a long, fruitful marriage? Nothing.

What do you call a blonde with a Doctorate in Physics? Doctor (Dr).

What do you get when you cross drugs with a bathtub? Whitney Houston's worst nightmare

The MLS

Q. Whats long and and can drip out fluids? a tap.

An atheist dies and so will we all, eventually.

Q. whats red and sits in a hairdressers? A. a baby getting its hair cut with a potato peeler

What's the best joke in the world? This one.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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