What did little Timmy get his grandmother for Christmas? A coffin

XD, Okay, but you gotta marry me too XD Its working again I am skipping class tonight, how about you come by uh, the day after tomorrow? And bring condoms I don't have any.

Your mama's so nice, she made me cookies once. And I enjoyed them.

A seal walks into a club.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor.

i hate when your sentence doesn't end as you testicle.

Dad, they tell me I am a slowpoke at school, what can I do? ... Eh son, this is mommy, your dad died ten years ago remember?

What did one dinosaure say to the other? Nothin, they are all dead. XD

Why did the retirement home go out of business. There was a fire and all of the residents charred to death accept for a couple who escaped but were too traumatized to return to the old folks home.

Why is this joke an anti joke? Because it's not trying to be funny.

What do they call Chinese food in China? Food

What did the Banana say to the Peach. Nothing, they are incapable of speaking because they are fruit.

What did the zebra say to the giraffe? Nothing, they can't talk dipshit.

I was raped the other day... I still did more work than the bitch

What's worse than getting a bruise? AIDS.

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah

Your mom is so fat she should probably go to her doctor and ask for a prescription of diabetic pills

Why did Visellet stop eating cherries? Because she choked on a pit and died.

what's worse that reading something that just wasted seconds of your life? reading this and wasting more seconds.

How do dogs mark their territory? With legal documents.

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She was blind.

Why did the chicken cross the road? His whole family attempted to cross the road approximately 30 seconds earlier and were immediately struck by a moving vehicle traveling at 45 miles per hour. He crossed the road to try to comfort his family while they took their final breathes of life. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a man that had recently been laid off from his union job and came down with a disease that is considered uncurable by modern science.

what did the indian boy say to his friend? I wish you were real

Black, det er geita, banke driten ut av Anders, han griner, dreper ikke, vil du ha telefonen eller? Jeg kommer med den litt senere, skal bare tørke blodet først pønsha han hardt i tryne blør ifra knyttnevene, skal jeg knekke bena på han eller noe? Geita. Ps Pen fitte har du flere bilder av a elle? Hvilket rom?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...