- Anti Joke

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She had finished her breakfast and had to get to her job as a firefighter.

What's big and fat? An obese man.

What did the the girl say to the deaf boy after he asked her out? He doesn't know

What's the worst thing about African poverty? The fact that there is no foreseeable solution to the problem of millions suffering.

Whats white and bad for your teeth? A refridgerator

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

– Hello. Is this a laundry? – Yes, it is a laundry.

what is worse than throwing a dead baby off a cliff? catching one with a pitchfork!!!!

a man walks into a bar the bar tender says why the long face? i just walked into a bar

Why did the young boy lose a testicle? Because he was viciously raped by a large parrot

what did the clock say to the other clock? .. were both lawyers!

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

What's green and has four wheels? A dolphin. I lied about it having four wheels. I lied about it being green. I lied about the whole thing.

Why did the chicken cross the road ? To achieve his goal on the other side of the road. Being a chicken he is not aware of the arm a fast traveling motor vehicle can bring to him.

What's the difference between a Corvette and a sack of dead babies? I don't have a Corvette in my garage.

How does a girl with no arms swing on the swing? She doesn't, she has no arms.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

What did the blonde do at the WTC on 9/11? Die.

Roses are red, Violets at blue. My mind is twisted, Bend over bitch your about to get fisted.

roses are red carnations are white dont go to bed or ill f**k your friend dwite

What is the biggest lie in everyone's childhood? "School lunch food is actually good."

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She had finished her breakfast and had to get to her job as a firefighter.

What's big and fat? An obese man.

What did the the girl say to the deaf boy after he asked her out? He doesn't know

A man killed himself.

What's the worst thing about African poverty? The fact that there is no foreseeable solution to the problem of millions suffering.

Rebecca Black's career.