An Atheist sneezed. Everyone around him said, "God bless you." He thanked them and continued on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A boy is eating with his family. A man in the next booth tells him "You are very handsome and you will be a movie star when you grow up." Then the man leaves. On the way out, the boy's mom says "You know he was drunk, right?"

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Blake wilkeys hair style

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

thumb_up thumb_down -4

I saw a "Baby on Board" bumper sticker on a car TARGET AQUIRED

thumb_up thumb_down -4

so three men walk into a bar and one is a priest.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Knock. Knock. Who's there? Alzheimer. Who?

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A dog walks into a bar and the bartender gives him a bowl of water because it is hot outside and he doesn't want the dog to dehydrate because he could die.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

I see said the blind man to his deaf wife as his crippled son pushed him in his wheelchair.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you say if you see a monkey driving a car? Nothing , you run away because primates are incapable to have motor skill and will probably crash within the next 50 feet

thumb_up thumb_down -4

what did one soldier say to the other... dude take your finger out my a** it has been that long

thumb_up thumb_down -4

what can you give to a millionaire to make him happy? sex

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q. What do black people, Asians, and Irishmen call their moms? A. "Mom"

thumb_up thumb_down -4

If you're riding on a jet ski and the wheels fall off, how many pancakes does it take to cover a car? Blue. Because Ice cream doesn't have any bones.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who's there?

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the duck cross the road? Because it was going to the destination he wanted to go to.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Not because she had no arms, but because she just had no hands.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

a woman votes!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What moos like a cow? Another cow

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the chicken cross the road? It couldn't handle the stress and pressure of being a duck so it committed suicide by crossing a road and therefor being run over by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How did the mom quiet her screaming baby? She threw it out the window.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Roses are red. Violets are red. Sunflowers are red. My garden is on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: Depends how hard you throw them.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do you call a black guy running from the cops? Nothing. He was out for his morning jog and he happened to run by the police.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops