Kid 1: Hey, guess what? Kid 2: Your MOM! HAHA! Kid 1:... My mother died two months ago from brain cancer after being shot in the head while fighting for our country in Iraq... Kid 2:.... um.. Your mom...?

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Roses are red Violets are red The grass is red OH MY GOD, THERE'S BLOOD EVERYWHERE!!!

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What's white and cant jump? A Fridge

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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whats good about poland... fukk all

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person 1: wanna hear a knock knock joke? Person 2: sure! Person 1: okay you start person 2: knock knock Person 1: who's there?

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A man goes to the doctor's office. The doctor says, "I have some bad news, and some worse news. The bad news is you have alzheimer's. The worse news is you have cancer." The man breaks down in tears.

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* How many roads must a man walk down before you call him a man? * He just need to go to the Register Office and change his name to "a man"

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Knock, knock. Who's there? I am.

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Me Chinese Me no joke Me die of cancer.

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What happens when a leprechaun refuses to give you his pot of gold? He doesn't give you his gold.

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How do you get 100 babies into a bucket? With a blender. How do you get them out again? With Doritos.

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where did Lucy go when the bomb dropped? everywhere.

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Whats worse than seeing a child with autism? Seeing a child doin' serious damage in a mosh pit

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How do you kill a ninja? Shoot it.

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Why couldn't the old man see? Because he was stabbed in the eye.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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What was Helen Keller book called Bsnshsiengwkaisg

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What is yellow, has wheels, and lays on it's back? A school bus after a traffic accident

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"I never want to see you again!" shouted Stevie Wonder to the genie in the bottle, as a young boy.

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Why did the man think he was hungry? Answer: Because his brain told that he needed to Eat or he was going to be really hungry. Made by eli

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Want to hear a funny joke? Me too.

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"Knock, knock." "You don't have to say that. The door's open, come on in."

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Your momma is so dumb she'd starve if she were trapped in a fully stocked grocery store. -Actually my mom has a pHD in Nutritional Science. If she were trapped in a fully stocked grocery store, she'd utilize that knowledge to maintain a balanced diet until a way was made available for her to return home.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops