With the exception of pigs, both pigs and blue jays can fly

John has 7 apples and Lisa has 4 apples John eats 3 apples and Lisa eats 1 apple and give another to John Their diets lacks various essential nutrients

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I threw him

Is this the Krusty Krab? No, This is Patrick.

"I see." said the blind man to his deaf son.

A man wearing a chicken t-shirt and holding a pair of dentures walks into the Youtube headquarters, then immediately walks out in fear of getting a copyright strike.

What did the retarded asian dolphin eat for breakfast? A big bowl of shit

a jew, a latino and an aboriginal walk into a bar this is an example of a great inter-racial comunity

A: Knock knock B: Who's there? A: Doctor B: Doctor who? A: Doctor Johnson, i'm here to check up on you. How's the medication going? B: It's going well thank you, it's working. A: That's very good to hear. Hope you recover soon. B: Thank you!

Q: A football coach walks into a bank. Why? A: Because one of his players is suffering from terminal cancer and he needs governmental funding for the team to play the big game against their rivals and to win, in hopes the kid will recover. Q: Why did the football coach go into the bank again? A: To receive more money to find a new running back.

Your mother is so fat, that if she had 8 clones of her, they would probably not be able to stand in the elevator together due to the maximum capacity, and safety hazard.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is blind and deaf, so it wold be near impossible for her to do so without seriously injuring herself or another human being.

A man calls his wife, but she doesn't pick up. He comes home and shouts his wife's name, but no one responds. He walks upstairs and sees the bedroom door half-opened. He enters and sees his wife sleeping.

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

Q: whats the differences between a bra and the canucks?? A: a bra has two cups

What do you call a large group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

why cant stephen hawking dance He does not enjoy dancing

whats wrose than slipping on a banana? Getting Shot in the face.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

A young girl walks out of a bar then gets raped.

So two Penn State administrators walk into a butt.

Obama

How do you do to stop a baby who is circling? You nail his other feet.

You see how lame this is?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...